Nonciclopedia: Service Suspension
[edit] From Nonciclopedia, the encyclopedia that liberates from orthography
Dear readers, dear creditors,
Nonciclopedia is closing due to a complaint filed by Vasco Rossi against the site. Vasco Rossi feels defamed by the page concerning him.
A trial will probably take place, at the end of which that pimple-faced fifteen-year-old who wrote the page after being bullied by his classmates will now have to pay support to the broke Vasco Rossi. A man who has lived through drug experiences, prison experiences, the experience of stadiums and crowds cheering for him, simply could not endure the idea of being the subject of satire on Nonciclopedia.
But let’s retrace the entire story to better explain the situation:
6000 BC: man forges metals.
3200 BC: man invents writing.
February 7, 1952: Vasco Rossi is born.
April 20, 1984: Vasco Rossi is arrested at the Variety, a nightclub in Bologna. Vasco Rossi voluntarily hands over 26 grams of cocaine to the authorities and spends 22 days in prison[1].
Afterwards: Vasco does other stupid things that we are tired of listing; there are too many[2]!
January 2010: Vasco Rossi's lawyer, or someone representing him, reads the relevant page on Nonciclopedia and realizes that this pile of nonsense could mark the end of the rock star's career.
WARNING: what is written in this box is a plausible reconstruction of events... but remember that reality can surpass fiction.
February 1, 2010, 12:00 PM: the lawyer informs Vasco about the existence of the page on Nonciclopedia.
February 1, 2010, 12:03 PM: the lawyer explains to Vasco what Nonciclopedia is.
February 1, 2010, 12:07 PM: the lawyer explains to Vasco what the internet is.
February 1, 2010, 12:12 PM: the lawyer responds to Vasco that "no, I don't have anything to light."
February 1, 2010, 12:13 PM: the lawyer explains to Vasco what a computer is.
February 1, 2010, 12:15 PM: the lawyer starts from a distance and begins with:
4000 BC: man invents writing.
February 1, 2010, 7:00 PM: Vasco and the lawyer are still on the phone.
February 1, 2010, 7:02 PM: the lawyer, tired of the situation, ends the conversation stating that he’s leaving it up to Vasco.
February 3, 2010: the lawyer sends an email to Nonciclopedia and a registered letter to Wikia, asking for the removal of the page as it is severely defamatory and requesting user data to proceed with their identification.
February 4, 2010: Nonciclopedia replies to the lawyer, briefly explaining what Nonciclopedia is, that it is unable to provide user data, and finally expressing its willingness to remove the defamatory parts that will be indicated by the lawyer, as has already happened in the past with other individuals who have reported their page.
In response, the lawyer does not reply, even though Nonciclopedia retains the read notification. There is no trace of the supposed registered letter sent to California, our host Wikia, as stated in the lawyer's email. Thus, thinking it to be a fake email as often happens, Nonciclopedia lets it go, having had no confirmation of the communication's validity.
August 18, 2011: an admin from Nonciclopedia is summoned by the postal police to explain how the site works. The police officers ask for an autograph. On the report.
The community decides to delete the Vasco Rossi page while awaiting further developments, communicating our decision to the lawyer and explaining that we were awaiting his response. The lawyer continues to ignore us despite the read notification.
September 2011: three more admins have been summoned by the postal police to explain how the site works.
Following these events, the administrators decided to close the site indefinitely.
We thank all those who contributed to this wonderful and special site, but even more, we thank all our readers for dedicating even a single minute to us.
Nonciclopedia is closing.
THANK YOU