JURIX

DeRank ™: 18,52

DeAge™ : 6433 days • Here since 30 october 2008

Evildead Annihilation Of Civilization

26 mar 11

Voto:

I listened to you once, I wasn’t really convinced. @THE DECLINE: I disagree with the fact that the (beautiful) cover depicts Jesolo, there’s a fundamental difference. In Jesolo, you can’t lie down like that, but you have to adhere to a strict beach planning regulation and there must be no more than 2.6 cm between one towel and another.

Britney Spears Femme Fatale

25 mar 11

Voto:

UNCLEBEASTTTTTTTTTTTT!!! So we'll meet up, I'll jump in too for the FU MANCHU!!! I’ll send you a private message with my number so we can grab a drink, is that cool?

Britney Spears Femme Fatale

25 mar 11

Voto:

What’s the difference between a tambourine player and terrorists? Terrorists have supporters.

Britney Spears Femme Fatale

25 mar 11

Voto:

Why do bagpipers walk while they play? To get away from the noise.

Britney Spears Femme Fatale

25 mar 11

Voto:

Child: "Mom, I want to grow up and be a Rock-and-Roll musician."
Mom: "Listen, my son, you have to choose. You can't do both!"

Britney Spears Femme Fatale

25 mar 11

Voto:

The wife walks into the bathroom and sees her husband in the shower calmly masturbating. Disgusted, she says to him, "Aren't you ashamed?" and he replies, "Oooh, can't a man wash his bird at the speed he wants?"

Britney Spears Femme Fatale

25 mar 11

Voto:

A skeleton goes to the doctor. The doctor looks at him and says: <Well, you could have come earlier.>

Britney Spears Femme Fatale

25 mar 11

Voto:

There’s an old man sitting on a bench in the park when a punk with a very noticeable red mohawk sits down next to him. The old man observes him, and the punk turns around and addresses the old man: “What’s up, grandpa? You’ve never been rebellious in your life?” The elderly man replies: “Well, to tell the truth, when I was young, I once fucked a chicken, and now I’m looking at you closely because you could be my son.”

Britney Spears Femme Fatale

25 mar 11

Voto:

A man drinks a bottle of whisky every day, for years and years. His wife, at a certain point, fills two glasses, one with water and one with whisky, and places them in front of her husband. Then she takes a box, pulls out a worm, puts it in the glass with water, and the worm swims. Then she takes a new worm, puts it in the glass with the whisky, and the worm dies immediately. At this, the woman points her finger at her husband and says, "What does this teach you??"
"That if I drink whisky, I won't have worms."

Britney Spears Femme Fatale

25 mar 11

Voto:

One ovary says to the other: “Did you order something from the music store?” and the other replies: “No, why?” “Well, there are two idiots who have been carrying an organ back and forth for half an hour.”