SCIMMIA Eugenio Finardi The first hit I took one night
At a friend's house, just to try it out
And I remember I was a bit scared
There’s a lot of violence in a needle in the veins
But in an instant, a sharp pain
One second waiting
Then a sweet wave of warmth
Almost like in love
And then I let myself go
Completely relaxed
In an artificial well-being
Like I’d never experienced before
But then at home I swore to myself
That I wouldn’t fall for it
"I’ll learn to use it
I’ll know how to manage, I won’t be tricked"
Yet I kept thinking about it
It wouldn’t leave my mind
And as time passed
It became the most important thing
"And I don’t care about
What people say
We’re all addicted anyway and what
Does it really matter?"
And I kept increasing
I was doing it almost every night
And right after I found myself fearing
I wouldn’t be able to find it anymore
And then hours, hours, hours
Outside a pharmacy waiting
And this jerk of a doctor
Won’t give it to me
But what the hell does he care
Ah, but one day he’ll pay
One day I’ll come in with a rock
And break his window
Come on, lend me a vial
I’ve been sweating for six hours
If I don’t get my fix
Tonight you know, I’ll go crazy
Then for two years I hardly did anything else
I didn’t play, didn’t make love
Killing time from one hit to another
Out and about or home sleeping
But one morning I asked myself:
"How is this going to end?"
Keep going, end up in jail
Maybe even die
And this can’t go on
It’s becoming almost like a job
Eight hours going around getting high
But by now I’m hardly high even on "hero"
And then I’m wasting time
And squandering what I have inside
I’m not growing this way
I’m burning out, but I’m fading
And quitting isn’t really that hard
It doesn’t even hurt that much
Just a bit of care and understanding
Maybe a little methadone
And outside there’s a whole world to discover
One that you can engage with
And if you can hold on for six months you’ll see
That then you’ll hardly think about it again
One of the hardest and rawest songs ever, but also sincere, about the (devastating) effects of "hero." The music also appropriately accompanies this "building tension."
Autobiographical? Who knows, but given the sentiment and passion, I would lean towards yes...
