Adriano Bernard

UH...Skid Row...the only ones who managed in the 80s to make hair metal for screaming girls, but with style: 3. But only because I'm feeling generous.

In fact, one person told me, as if it were the greatest quality in the world, that "nobody filled stadiums like Bon Jovi." Crazy stuff!

What hypnosphere says is absolutely true. A few weeks ago, I left a comment regarding the latest Bon Jovi video on YouTube. I was attacked by numerous furious fans who claimed that Bon Jovi was hard rock, that he had made rock history, that his romantic songs were deeply moving, that he was also a singer-songwriter, that there was no one like him, etc... Crazy stuff, and they were mostly Americans, but not kids—ADULTS. Terrifying.

I had quite a bit of fun. Spiderpork, spiderpork, with its legs on the sofa...

Her version of that perfect masterpiece "Hallelujah" by Leonard Cohen is flatter than a sole: I would describe it as somewhere between anesthetic and heavy soporific, a sort of sleeping pill... "Broken" is a whine for faux-fake-alternative girls, while "Stay" is so neutral and insignificant that I can't understand how a human being could have composed it; it is absolute artistic nothingness. Not to mention the uselessness of "Together," the whines like "Luce" or "Pearl Days," and the fake rock of "Swan" or "Gift"... Until we reach creative anorexia with the "family package songs" of "Almeno Tu nell'universo" and "Una poesia anche per te," which are truly the artistic nothingness disguised as universal singer-songwriter reflection. Better not get me started on the duet with Ligabue (you heard right, Ligabue!!! LI-GA-BU-E!) titled "Gli ostacoli del cuore." Compared to this last song, "Solo Ieri" by Ramazzotti is musically more creative. At least he doesn’t pretend to be a singer-songwriter. For me, the VERY FEW "decent" things Elisa has done are "Labyrinth," which remains classy pop and isn’t too boring, and especially "Un senso di te," which is still a nice song with a beautiful atmosphere. Anyway, Elisa's music cannot be compared to Björk's; the main reason being that Elisa draws from trivial songs that are as useless as they are classic and overplayed, based on four little acoustic guitar chords, while Björk experiments with everything. The only thing Björk and Elisa have in common is the "alternative air," with that false shy and fragile vibe that drives millions of faux-alternative thirteen-year-olds crazy: only Björk can afford it because she actually is alternative, while Elisa only has the attitude. The only one who annoys me even more than Elisa is her photocopy: L'Aura, useless, zero, crap, garbage, compositional nothingness and that little vibe even in videos, which I would describe as a stupid immature faux-alternative girl. Sorry for the venting...

It was about time someone reviewed them.

This is not a review; it is just a description of the plot, it doesn't work.

A piece of advice for the reviewer: next time I suggest you write the review first and then roll a joint, not the other way around! :-)))

This review is written like shit, and you haven't even realized that that's the genius of it. It's true that it's written like shit, but there are many types of "reviews written like shit": some people write in a convoluted way to better communicate an idea they have about the film, and then there are those who have no ideas and just write nonsense for the sake of writing. In my opinion, this review is part of the first type: the film is raw, confusing, hypnotically violent, just like the review.

Lethe | Date: 24/9/2007 | Rating: — | Album Rating: 5
<<1984, while the NWOBHM reaches its twilight >>... and thank goodness!!!!!! _____> Nominated for "bullshit of the month." Good review.