Bartleboom

DeRank ™: 35,89
DeAge™ : 7610 days • Here since 9 august 2005
Love Contact
La Rete La Rete
La Rete La Rete
20 dec 16
Voto:
In a world where it was mandatory to write and publish every fart that crosses our mind, it would be a masterpiece. And instead...
Korn The Serenity of Suffering
Korn The Serenity of Suffering
14 dec 16
Voto:
Too much malice against this group. Mine is also primarily an admission of guilt. When their first albums came out, I wanted to hook up with a girl who had breasts that looked like they were drawn by Botero and who was crazy about these guys, but at the time my favorite song was "Ready to fuck (all the bitches)" by Sarcofago and I just didn't get it. As a result, I wasn't getting laid. Then our paths diverged, and I got involved with someone who enjoyed being spanked. Having solved the age-old issue of seminal fluid stagnation, I was able to look at the world with renewed optimism and listen to Korn with renewed clarity. As of today, my thought is that these guys knew what they were doing; they had their big, booming sounds that everyone wanted to copy, their atmospheres that everyone wanted to replicate, and at least a hell of a drummer. Plus, they called Greg Capullo to do their artwork. But then, you might ask, why should we deprecate them, wise Bartolo? Brothers and sisters, essentially for two main reasons: the first, fundamental, is that ridiculous headbanging while holding your balls, which, holy shit, twenty years later still feels like a cut-off from Dustin Hoffman's audition for Rain Man. The second, essential, is that damn Johnathan - adventure dimension in the restroom of the rest area - Davis and all his stories that touched him as a child and that even though he later filmed a video around Miami in a glittery Ferrari, he still hadn't managed to conquer the inner demon from when mom and dad stopped loving each other while being completely naked. Johnny, do the world a favor, off yourself by swallowing a stuffed teddy bear and stop bothering us.
HammerFall Gates of Dalhalla
HammerFall Gates of Dalhalla
3 dec 16
Voto:
I remember when Glory To The Brave was released, the metal heads in my area proclaimed it to be a divine record from the Madonna di Ghisa of Vanzaghello, and that everyone aspiring to be a true metalhead had to have it on vinyl (I swear). Then it came out that there was a bit of a shady deal with the record label, but - aside from this small-town squabble - I recall that even in the specialized magazines, the first Hammerfall was highly praised. Personally, I have always considered them one of the most unnecessary bands in the entire history of metal. They do what Helloween did 30 years ago, only without the inventiveness, power, and personality of Helloween, taking a more "defender" approach, which back at the time of their first release really made me want to drop my arms and my fine Scottish socks. However, some of their tracks kicked ass pretty well, and watching their videos online, I found them chubby and very likable. So, I don't see particular reasons to fuss too much about my old-school rants. You're good, and you have enviable enthusiasm. You bring metal to this area, and for that alone, you deserve my respect. But be careful with repetitions and the sequence. Other than that, well done.
Luca Goldoni Dipende
Luca Goldoni Dipende
30 nov 16
Voto:
Few times, since I became a playground maniac on this site, have I understood so little of a review/page/artist/work/omissionfor give me forgive me forgive me for a huge guilt. But I don't want to come off as a sourpuss, so I’ll give you a 5. Bravo bravo.
burzum burzum/aske
burzum burzum/aske
26 nov 16
Voto:
In these last days of November, thoughts immediately turn to Norway and its werewolves. Thank you for everything and forever, supreme master...
More Than Life Love Let Me Go
More Than Life Love Let Me Go
25 nov 16
Voto:
Nice review, but above all a proposal that I'm really very interested in. Well done, well done.
Sabaton The Last Stand
Sabaton The Last Stand
24 nov 16
Voto:
Great review. I tried listening to them because a friend of mine keeps posting their videos on FB, but honestly, I’m afraid this genre is no longer for me. You, however, are really good.
Mamoru Oshii Ghost In The Shell
Mamoru Oshii Ghost In The Shell
24 nov 16
Voto:
I just barely finished watching Serial Experiment Lain. Intriguing, experimental, with a very interesting graphic style (even if the quality of the drawing is mediocre and has aged terribly), a stunning beginning, and, above all, insights of almost unsettling foresight... but what a drag. It took me more than six months to watch 13 episodes. It's so boring that watching the lottery draws on TV feels like a Michael Mann thriller in comparison. I acknowledge that it's a viewing experience that is, in some ways, obligatory, but really, what a drag.
Body/Head No Waves
Body/Head No Waves
20 nov 16
Voto:
Enhanced review
Sentenced The Cold White Light
Sentenced The Cold White Light
17 nov 16
Voto:
I could rewrite NeKro's comment: Amok is a true masterpiece. Then, with the gothic turn and the change in singers, there was a strange trend towards "subtraction" and simplification that I never understood and that I still haven't fully appreciated: no more solos, no more complex structures, instead we get melodies that are often overly affected, buzzy sounds, and catchy choruses. That said, it's not even a bad album, but...
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