NickGhostDrake

DeRank ™: 4,46

DeAge™ : 8247 days • Here since 12 november 2003

Klaxons Myths Of The Near Future

3 feb 07

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Alright, I’ll keep you happy: I’ll continue. RULE NUMBER 9> LEARN TO STAND UP TO THE OASIS. Statement from James (Jack, Jojo, or whatever his name is): "I would love it if Noel (Gallagher, ed.) appreciated us!" (this means gaining a lot of votes on the left). He continues: "But the other day he stated that listening to us is a inhuman torture for him" (immediate loss of votes in the center). Here comes the buddy, Simon, or Sailor, or Seymour, in short, the singer, or maybe the bassist. He says: "It gives me pleasure just thinking that the Gallaghers don’t appreciate me! Fuck them!" (immediate gain of the right-wing vote base). 1!

Rage Against the Machine Rage Against the Machine

3 feb 07

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Dr. Fottermeir, I want to come with you!

Klaxons Myths Of The Near Future

3 feb 07

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hugoniot I'm sorry you don't appreciate my maxims (maxims?!). Could you suggest something yourself? I'm always open to discussion, especially towards the different! Or do you have no ideas? :) come on, hugoniot, open your mind!

Klaxons Myths Of The Near Future

3 feb 07

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enough, you carry on.

Klaxons Myths Of The Near Future

3 feb 07

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RULE 7> KNOW YOUR ENEMY. The moment when the readers of the biggest magazine vote for the worst and honestly unbearable piece of "Chasing Cars" by Snow Patrol as the single OF ALL TIME (which I had moderately liked, but now they’re just another pain in the ass), it means that a re-foundation of the rules of alternative music, indie or whatever the hell you want, is necessary. 1!

Klaxons Myths Of The Near Future

3 feb 07

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RULE 6> Be a jerk, but be a polite jerk. Let's read together "The Guardian": "In Klaxons there is always this eternal projection of drugs as a driving force of inspiration, heavy drugs, rave drugs, to enhance appeal, but the trio maintains an incredible ability to stay sensitive to external impulses." But what the hell does that mean? 1!

Klaxons Myths Of The Near Future

3 feb 07

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RULE 5> Pretend to be cultured. Pretend to read books (books? with these records? with this kind of music?). Obviously always the same ones, no one reads them but everyone keeps them ready on their lips: Boroughs, Brautigan, sometimes Ballard (more rare). 1!

Klaxons Myths Of The Near Future

3 feb 07

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RULE 4> Let your fans do the dirty work. Organize them well, forums, chats, magazines, a pyramid structure with a wide base and a narrow apex: your wallet. 1!

Klaxons Myths Of The Near Future

3 feb 07

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RULE 3> Capitalize on being pretty enough by removing your little flaws from the videos, and pretending that the whole world is one big, endless, inexhaustible F***. "It's sexy, innit?" It's what people WANT. A sexy-pop video!". 1!

Klaxons Myths Of The Near Future

3 feb 07

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RULE 2> DON’T PAY ATTENTION TO THOSE WHO CRITICIZE YOUR BUSINESS CHOICES. Taking inspiration from a statement by the guitarist (someone named james, or jamie, or jack, or jojo): "They say to me ah! you signed with the Girls Aloud's label! Yes, it’s true, we did, but first the label helped them achieve success, and second, Girls Aloud are a damn awesome pop group!" 1!