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Rating: In a world where doubts increase more and more, I can say I have at least one certainty: I hate Piero Scaruffi. Unbearable and pretentious, Scaruffi perfectly embodies the figure of a music critic, with that mix of nerdiness and fake know-it-all attitude that often characterizes it. To add elements of interest (so to speak), there's his website, a jumble of approximations and Times New Roman comparable to a Diplodocus fossil (have you taken a look at the graphics? Probably a Triceratops would have done better).
Somewhere between delusions of grandeur and the desire to catalog human knowledge, Piero's effort contains moments of unexpected enlightenment: just visit the page dedicated to theAqua, a Scandinavian group known from the late '90s to the early new millennium. Influenced by the beauty of the singer Lene Grawford Nystrøm or coming from a disco night spent pestering well-endowed MILFs, the essayist from Trivero produces one of the most genius chapters of his avoidable career, consisting of a seven given to Aquarium, the debut of the Nordic band. The news is incredible since Scaruffi reserves this score for compositions by Johann Sebastian Bach or, alternatively, to obscure albums by Anglo-Iranian songwriters.
Driven by the marvel and the incredible convergence of events, I decided to dust off Aquarium, the first CD purchased by yours truly back in 1997 (yes, who would have thought). The cover photo immediately catches the attention, portraying the quartet in a fun underwater pose, seasoned with Barbara D’Urso-like filters and an enviable kitsch taste. After peeking at the tracklist, we discover that the album contains eleven tracks for about forty minutes of music, a good introduction for a pop album without great expectations. Regarding the sound, there is little to say: we are not facing minimalist suites or endless psychedelic jam sessions, but rather an honest dance-pop product, excellently packaged by keyboardist Søren Rasted and guitarist Claus Norreen. The vocal parts are entrusted to the already mentioned Lene and René Dif, a disturbing big man with a baritone voice (this definition I owe to Piero), a stage animal often at the center of attention for a supposed love story with the beautiful Norwegian (the other members are Danish).
Starting from these premises begins the journey with Aqua, a path that turns out to be more varied and even more exciting than expected. Of course, it's impossible not to mention the singles churned out in rapid succession by the band: "My Oh My", "Doctor Jones", "Roses Are Red", "Lollipop (Candyman)" and especially "Barbie Girl", a real hit that, in addition to causing legal troubles for Aqua for the use of the famous doll's name, changes the career of our friends forever, transforming them into international superstars. The recipe for the songs remains the same but incredibly successful: simple and suggestive lyrics, eurodance sounds (some might say "bubblegum") and a great desire for fun. Not to forget the videos, where René and company interpret stories inspired by the cartoon world, full of irony and clownish moments (again thanks, Piero).
However, Aquarium is also something else. Even today, for example, I'm surprised by the Latin vibes of "Heat of the Night" and some "serious" tracks, which admirably break the tension. Leaving aside "Good Morning Sunshine" (perhaps the weakest track, with a not-so-successful rap insert), we can note "Be a Man", a slow song that highlights Lene's vocal qualities (to which we have referred earlier), and especially the excellent "Turn Back Time", where Aqua's pop becomes sophisticated (the song will later be included in the Sliding Doors soundtrack: not just any old stuff). Let's add two songs like "Happy Boys & Girls" and "Calling You", danceable and blatantly radio-friendly, and the game is done.
At this point, it is evident that the famous seven given to Aquarium is not the result of peyote intoxication, inadvertently experienced by Scaruffi during a visit to a hippie friend of his (let us remember that the critic, thankfully, resides in San Francisco), but rather the result of a lucid analysis, one of the few I have happened to read on his jumbled and encyclopedic site.
Come on then: let’s welcome the "exuberant polyrhythms", the "eccentricities sparingly distributed", the "melodic counterpoints with crystalline timbres", whatever these might be. Let's abandon our seminal albums for a moment and dive into idiocy, the never-unpleasant foolishness, the "more Latin than Nordic humor". Piero has turned on the stereo, the party begins.
In the heat of the night
We are having a fiesta
We dance until siesta
When the sun comes alive
Oh
DeReviewer Rating: 4/4.5
Tracklist Lyrics and Videos
02 My Oh My (03:27)
(Chorus 1)
My oh my do you wanna say goodbye?
To have their Kingdom, baby, tell me why?
My oh my do you wanna say goodbye?
To rule a country, baby, you and I?
If you were my King....
[Chorus 1]
A little princess in a terrible mess,
a kingdom alone, with no lovers confess,
dreams of a prince on a tall white horse,
runs like a spirit by the castle walls.
(Chorus 2)
Gotta steal from the rich, when they don't know I'm coming,
gotta give to the poor, no time for lovin'
My oh my don't you cry, 'coz there is no way I'm staying,
I will leave say "bye bye", I'm going my way...
[Chorus 1]
(Chorus 3)
If you were my King...
Whoa oh oh
I would be your queen....
Whoa oh oh
If you were my King...
Whoa oh oh
I would be your queen....
Whoa oh oh
Mystery deep in the royal heart,
crying at night, I wanna be a part
Prince, oh, prince, are you really sincere,
that you one day are gonna disappear
[Chorus 2]
My oh my, whoa oh oh
My oh my, whoa oh oh
My oh my, whoa oh oh
My oh my
[Chorus 1]
[Chorus 1]
[Chorus 3]
03 Barbie Girl (03:20)
- Hiya, Barbie!
- Hi, Ken!
- You wanna go for a ride?
- Sure, Ken!
- Jump in!
''Chorus:''
I'm a Barbie girl in a Barbie world
life in plastic, it's fantastic
You can brush my hair, undress me everywhere
Imagination, life is your creation
Come on Barbie, let's go party!
''Chorus''
I'm a blond bimbo girl in a fantasy world
Dress me up, make me talk, I'm your dollie
(ken)
You're my doll, rock'n'roll, feel the glamour and pain
Kiss me here, touch me there, hanky panky
You can touch, you can play
if you say I'm always yours, oohoh
''Chorus''
''Bridge:''
Come on Barbie, let's go party!
Ah ah ah yeah
Come on Barbie, let's go party!
Ooh woa, ooh woa
Come on Barbie, let's go party!
Ah ah ah yeah
Come on Barbie, let's go party!
Ooh woa, ooh woa
Make me walk, make me talk, do whatever you please
I can act like a star, I can beg on my knees
Come jump in, be my friend, let us do it again
Hit the town, fool around, let's go party
You can touch, you can play
if you say, I'm always yours
You can touch, you can play
if you say, I'm always yours
''Bridge''
''Chorus x2''
''Bridge''
- Oh, I'm having so much fun!
- Well Barbie, we're just gettin' started
- Oh, I love you Ken!
04 Good Morning Sunshine (04:07)
When the sun is up,
on a clear blue sky,
you will act like a lover.
When the sky is grey,
and the rain comes down,
you will run for cover.
(Chorus 1)
Feel the heat, come out of cold,
and your arm is touching me.
(Chorus 2)
Good morning sunshine,
you are my only light,
flying with me by my side,
you keep me warm all day.
Just stay with me.
(Chorus 3)
Good morning sunshine,
be with me all day,
Just don't let the rain pass you by,
when it's cloudy or windy
and the snowflakes arrive,
you somehow just make me,
make me feel I'm alive.
When you leave my field
then you light the stars
Fading away in horizon
there is a million streets
leading off the night,
waiting for sun to be risen
[Chorus 1]
[Chorus 2]
[Chorus 3]
Hold it right there,
let me take a minute of your time,
to explain how I feel through these rhymes.
I do the best I can, and believe me if I could
I'll build you a paradise with these two hands.
the touch of your skin, makes my body go numb,
I'm thinking to myself, has my dream come true,
or is it 'cause you never give me a chance to tell you how I feel
the moments we had were too precious to kill.
When it is cloudy or windy,
please turn your face at me
[Chorus 2]
[Chorus 3]
Make me feel I'm alive...
05 Doctor Jones (03:26)
Sometimes, the feeling is right,
you fall in love for the first time
heartbeat, and kisses so sweet,
summertime love in the moonlight.
Aye yippey aye oo
Aye yippey aye yeah
Aye yippey aye oo wah
Now that summer is gone, you have to go back home.
Please come and see me again, I never felt more alone.
Baby, I'm missing you
I want you by my side.
And I hope you miss me too
Come back and stay.
I think about you every day
I really want you too.
You swept my feet right off the ground, you're the love I found.
Doctor Jones, Jones,
Calling Doctor Jones
Doctor Jones, Doctor Jones,
Get up now.
Wake up now.
Doctor Jones, Jones,
Calling Doctor Jones
Doctor Jones, Doctor Jones,
Wake up now.
Wake up now.
Aye yippey aye oo
Aye yippey aye yeah
Aye yippey aye oo wah
Aye yippey aye oo
Aye yippey aye yeah
Aye yippey aye oo wah
All I think of is you,
and all of the things we had.
Doctor, what can I do?
Why does he have to be like that?
Baby, I'm missing you
I want you by my side.
And I hope you'll miss me too
Come back and stay.
I think about you every day
I really want you to.
You swept my feet right off the ground, you're the love I found.
Doctor Jones, Jones,
Calling Doctor Jones
Doctor Jones, Doctor Jones,
Get up now.
Wake up now.
Doctor Jones, Jones,
Calling Doctor Jones
Doctor Jones, Doctor Jones,
Wake up now.
Wake up now.
Aye yippey aye oo
Aye yippey aye yeah
Aye yippey aye oo wah
Aye yippey aye oo
Aye yippey aye yeah
Aye yippey aye oo wah
Please, please cure me.
Please, please cure me.
Please, please cure me.
Please, please cure me.
Doctor Jones, Jones,
Wake up now.
Doctor Jones, Jones,
Wake up now.
Doctor Jones, Jones,
Wake up now.
Doctor Jones, Jones,
Wake up now.
Aye yippey aye oo
Aye yippey aye yeah
Aye yippey aye oo wah
Aye yippey aye oo
Aye yippey aye yeah
Aye yippey aye oo wah
Doctor Jones, Jones,
Calling Doctor Jones
Doctor Jones, Doctor Jones,
Get up now.
Wake up now.
Doctor Jones, Jones,
Calling Doctor Jones
Doctor Jones, Doctor Jones,
Wake up now.
Wake up now.
06 Heat of the Night (03:38)
In the heat of the night,
we are having a fiesta,
we dance until siesta,
when the sun comes alive.
In the heat of the night,
we are having a fiesta,
let's dance until siesta,
when the sun comes alive.
oooh oooh ooh ooooh
I've been waiting for summertime to come
welcome beaches, lying in the sun
music playing, people everywhere
no need to worry, the tequila is here
And when the sun goes down we are having fun,
'cause there will be a party going on...
In the heat of the night,
we are having a fiesta,
we dance until siesta,
when the sun comes alive.
In the heat of the night,
we are having a fiesta,
let's dance until siesta,
when the sun comes alive.
oooh oooh ooh ooooh
Heat of the night.
Heat of the night.
Life is easy, on a holiday
only problems seem so far away,
the bar is open, and everybody sings:
"excuse me senorita, for you free drinks"
And when the sun goes down we are having fun,
'cause there will be a party going on...
In the heat of the night,
we are having a fiesta,
we dance until siesta,
when the sun comes alive.
In the heat of the night,
we are having a fiesta,
let's dance until siesta,
when the sun comes alive.
oooh oooh ooh ooooh
Heat of the night.
'Cause when the sun goes down we are having fun,
and there will be a party going on...
In the heat of the night,
we are having a fiesta,
In the heat of the night, night
we are having a fiesta,
"Let's swing it copa de dance!"
"Hola senorita, let's go to the beach."
In the heat of the night,
we are having a fiesta,
we dance until siesta,
when the sun comes alive.
In the heat of the night,
we are having a fiesta,
let's dance until siesta,
when the sun comes alive.
Heat of the night.
Heat of the night.
07 Be a Man (04:26)
The world is quiet,
Like there's no one around,
But I feel you beside me.
I know the secrets,
You keep locked away inside,
Don't understand why you're fighting.
I know, she must be special,
This new girl by your side,
I seek the answers,
When I look into your eyes,
And it hurts like hell but I will be strong.
(Chorus)
For once in your life,
Be a man,
Just tell me the words,
'Cause I know that you can,
Don't leave me with scars,
That no one can heal.
For once in your life - be a man.
You made me love you,
Love you right from the start.
You're controlling my heart, babe.
Don't pack your bags yet.
Give me time to say goodbye.
(Say goodbye)
Just don't leave me wounded.
Now,
I just hope you will regret the things you do
Come back to me,
'Cause our love is the real thing.
And and it hurts like hell but I will be strong.
[Chorus]
I knew that I,
I fought to keep our love strong.
If you leave me now,
You come running back for more, babe.
And I hope for,
And I wish for,
And I pray,
That the words from your mouth can,
Eventually make you a man.
For once in your life,
Be a man.
When everything stops...
...for a minute in your life,
I'll hope that,
[Chorus]
Be a man.
Tell me the words.
Once in your life.
Be a man.
Tell me the words.
08 Lollipop (Candyman) (03:39)
I am the Candyman - Coming from Bountyland.
I am the Candyman - Coming from Bountyland.
I wish that you were my Lollipop.
Sweet things, I will never get enough.
If you show me to the sugar tree,
will you give me a sodapop for free.
Come with me Honey,
I'm your sweet sugar Candyman.
Run like the wind - fly with me to Bountyland.
Bite me, I'm yours - if you're hungry please understand.
This is the end - of the sweet sugar Candyman.
Oh my love - I know you are my Candyman,
And oh my love - your word is my command.
Oh my love - I know you are my Candyman,
And oh my love - let us fly to Bountyland.
You are my Lollipop - sugar sugar top
You are my Lollipop - sugar sugar top
I wish that I were a Bubblegum,
chewing on me baby all day long.
I will be begging for sweet delight,
until you say I'm yours tonight.
Come with me Honey,
I'm your sweet sugar Candyman.
Run like the wind - fly with me to Bountyland.
Bite me, I'm yours - if you're hungry please understand.
This is the end - of the sweet sugar Candyman.
Oh my love - I know you are my Candyman,
And oh my love - your word is my command.
Oh my love - I know you are my Candyman,
And oh my love - let us fly to Bountyland.
Oh my love - I know you are my Candyman,
And oh my love - your word is my command.
Oh my love - I know you are my Candyman,
And oh my love - let us fly to Bountyland.
I am the Candyman - Coming from Bountyland
I am the Candyman - Coming from Bountyland
Oh my love - I know you are my Candyman,
And oh my love - your word is my command.
Oh my love - I know you are my Candyman,
And oh my love - let us fly to Bountyland.
You are my Lollipop - sugar sugar top
You are my Lollipop - sugar sugar top
09 Roses Are Red (03:48)
Roses are red and
Violets are blue
Honey is sweet, but not as sweet as you
Roses are red and
Violets are blue.
ad id aid id mud
ad id aid id mud
Dum di da di dam
(repeat 6 times)
Come pick my Roses!
Sweet from the flowers
honey from the bees
I got a feeling, I'm ready to release
Roses are red and
Violets are blue
Honey is sweet,
but not as sweet as you.
It's invisible but, so touchable
And I can feel it on my body,
so emotional.
I'm on a ride, on a ride
I'm a passenger.
I'm a victim of a heart love messenger.
Dum di da di da
Dum di da di da
Dum di da di da
The only thing you said was
Dum di da di da
Dum di da di da
Dum di da di da
And roses are red.
Come with me baby,
Please fulfill my wish
Show it to me truly,
Show me with a kiss.
Roses are red and
Violets are blue
Honey is sweet,
but not as sweet as you.
It's invisible but, so touchable
And I can feel it on my body,
so emotional.
I'm on a ride, on a ride
I'm a passenger.
I'm a victim of a heart love messenger.
Dum di da di dam
Dum di da di dam
Dum di da di dam
The only thing you said was
Dum di da di dam
Dum di da di dam
Dum di da di dam
And roses are red.
Dum di da di dam
Dum di da di dam
Dum di da di dam
The only thing you said was
Dum di da di dam
Dum di da di dam
ad id aid id mud
ad id aid id mud
Dum di da di dam
Dum di da di dam
Dum di da di dam
Dum di da di dam
Don't take my roses away!
Dum di da di dam
Dum di da di dam
Dum di da di dam
The only thing you said was
Dum di da di dam
Dum di da di dam
Dum di da di dam
And roses are red.
Dum di da di dam
Dum di da di dam
Dum di da di dam
The only thing you said was
Dum di da di dam
Dum di da di dam
Dum di da di dam
My roses are red.
oooh oooh oooh, yeah!
ad id aid id mud
ad id aid id mud
10 Turn Back Time (04:12)
Give me time to reason,
Give me time to think it through.
Passing through the season,
Where I cheated you.
I will always have a cross to wear,
But the bolt reminds me I was there.
So give me strength,
To face this test tonight.
If only I could turn back time,
If only I had said what I still hide.
If only I could turn back time,
I would stay for the night... for the night
Claim your right to science,
Claim your right to see the truth
Though my pangs of conscience,
Will drill a hole in you.
I've seen it coming like a thief in the night,
I've seen it coming from the flash of your light.
So give me strength,
to face this test tonight
If only I could turn back time,
if only I had said what I still hide
if only I could turn back time,
I would stay.
The bolt reminds me I was there
the bolt reminds me I was there
(repeat chorus until fade out)
11 Calling You (03:33)
C-A-L-L-I-N-G now I'm calling you
Calling you now
C-A-L-L-I-N-G now. I'm calling you
Calling you now
Ohh oh-oh-oh
I-yi-yi can't get my message through
Why-yi-yi don't you pick up the phone
All my love is running down the line
But you won't receive it, no, no
I-yi-yi will miss the sweet words
And cry-yi-yi if you tell me the same
What I hear is just a old, lame
Occupied signal tone
Operator all you have to do
is connect me. I am waiting for it
Help me, I am waiting to be
C-A-L-L-I-N-G now. I'm calling you
Calling you now
C-A-L-L-I-N-G now. I'm calling you
Calling you now
Ohh oh-oh-oh
Ohh oh-oh-oh
Ohh oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh
Ohh oh-oh-oh
I-yi-yi, I call you once again
And I-yi-yi resist to give in
Now my love is running down the drain
So you won't receive it, no, no
I-yi-yi will miss the sweet words
And cry-yi-yi if you tell me the same
What I hear is just a old, lame
Occupied signal tone
Operator all you have to do is connect me
I am waiting for it
Help me, I am waiting to be
C-A-L-L-I-N-G now. I'm calling you
Calling you now
C-A-L-L-I-N-G now. I'm calling you
Calling you now
Ohh oh-oh-oh
I-yi-yi - Operator
I-yi-yi - Operator
I-yi-yi - Operator
I-yi-yi - Operator
C-A-L-L-I-N-G now. I'm calling you
Calling you now
C-A-L-L-I-N-G now. I'm calling you
Calling you now
Ohh oh-oh-oh
Ohh oh-oh-oh
Ohh oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh
Ohh oh-oh-oh
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