Zayn
pillowtalk

LA RECENSIONE

The king is back.

The shocking news of Zayn Malik's departure, a member of One Direction and the band's guru/dalai lama/jim morrison, caused a spike in suicides in England, the United States, and Iceland. But those dreadful days are over, as is (alas) the fame of my beloved, given that now the views have shifted to that single individual, a pop genius without business (Zayn™ is human, and for this I admire him greatly).

Pillowtalk was released by surprise on YouTube on January 28, 2016, when everyone believed Zayn™ was set for life and the love for the fans was over. But the youngster has grown up, he’s no longer the one from mi fist, his new blonde hairstyle makes it (forcefully) clear.

We have a very dark and mystical setting, I would even dare say almost nightclub-ish. Chiaroscuros are omnipresent, while Zayn™'s new hair reflects pure energy, as if to symbolize a rebirth, a mature artistic journey.

The models start dancing and making out while Zayn™ sings a synth-metal melody, all possibly under the influence of heavy drugs. The entire video takes the form of an artistically egotistical megatrip dictated by our producers, who nonetheless lightened the final result to avoid protests from the animal-loving parents of the fans (shame on you, do-gooder producers, shame!).

Noteworthy are the dancers (especially the one of darker complexion than the others with hardcore facial piercings that change shape at 2:35, visually suggestive effect), the atrocity of the bare breast which personally, as a good Christian, I would have avoided but ANYWAY it doesn’t ruin the actual quality of the visual experience (these scenes appear more than once in the course of 3 minutes and 26 sec., all we were missing was blasphemy in the background but Zayn™ is Catholic like all of us faithful Catholic Christians, so he wisely avoided it).

Zayn™ at a certain point (more precisely at minute 1:19) begins to duplicate, which probably symbolizes his superiority over the original band, because his mind is one, none, and a hundred thousand. His voice is further confirmation of his talent without any electronic gadget at his side (e.g. autotune, barbarically introduced to the mainstream world by that cow Cher™ in 1998), something a normal Kayn East could never have reproduced (sorry if I spelled it wrong but these guys can't be read). My personal compliments to Zayn™ then.

The symphonic-hardcore turn I personally consider excellently successful! The video equally so. We now await the new album from our new modern pop genius, but in the meantime let’s enjoy Pillowtalk as it should be: equipped with Turtle beach and a nice Joint!!! (as a good Buddhist Catholic I cannot affirm my horrendous word in my mother tongue; I risk being excommunicated from my church if I'm caught!)

Review courtesy of the group OneDirection. Dedicated to the debaserian doc Darius, no longer around for some time. Greetings to the faithful :-)

-2mil