AA.VV.
Sanremo 2006 -56° Festival della Canzone Italiana

Warning number 1.
This review is quite long (so I apologize in advance to the editors) therefore if the mere idea of hearing about Sanremo bores you, just leave it and go read another review. Otherwise, happy reading!

Warning number 2.
This review was written before knowing the illustrious verdict regarding the winner of this unique (in the sense that it could also be the last) and unforgettable (and I'm not going to explain the reasons) edition of the Festival (of the worst) of the Italian Song. The awards reported here were assigned by the author of this review and reflect exclusively her personal impressions.

Comeback Award: Simona Bencini. Because, did you remember her? Honestly, I didn't. Anyway, the piece, given the Sanremo standard, isn't bad. Rating: 3

Guitar Award: Alex Britti. Show me one shot of this Festival where he was without a guitar! Even when they were announcing the eliminations on Thursday, he was there strumming random chords. At least someone shows they're there to play! Rating: 4

Hope the Title is a Good Omen Award: Luca Dirisio who sings off-key "Sparirò". Rating: 0

I'm a Tough One and I'll Prove It to You Award: Dolcenera. Wasn't she supposed to sing a swear word that would change our lives? I didn't hear it! Horrible song, banal title, obviously one of the favorites to win! Rating: 0

Nobody is a Fool Award: Gigi Finizio. He brings along a bunch of thirteen-year-olds who play (or pretend to play) and sings a series of clichés. Meanwhile, he becomes known to the "general public", who's the fool now! Rating: 0

I'll Never Come Back to Sanremo Award: Gianluca Grignani. A song above the Sanremo standard. Eliminated. Rating: 4

Greats of Music Award: Nomadi. The singer could even sing the shopping list but with that voice, he can move even stones! Rating: 5

Roxanne Award: Nicky Niccolai. Raises a rather common and overused theme. When she sings, she shows she actually studied singing, but she opens her mouth so wide that sooner or later she'll swallow some flies or hornets! Rating: 2

What the Heck Did We Come Here For Award: Noa and the entire motley crew in tow. Useless song, already forgotten! Rating: 0

Pathetic Award: Anna Oxa (do you want an explanation?). Rating: 0

Over 30 Kids Song Festival Award: Povia. Does he intend to make these kinds of little songs until he's 90? Anyway, it's a simple and catchy tune, all things considered pleasant. Rating: 3

Charity Award: Ron. He will donate the (few) proceeds to research on an incurable disease (which is commendable even if he tells every wall about it!), duets with Tosca (why? Did you hear from her after '96?) and kisses Bertè. So, besides a big heart, also a big liver! Rating: 1

You Must Go Award: Spagna (here too, the explanation seems superfluous). Rating: 0

We Are Clones of the Vibrazioni Award: Sugarfree (as above). Rating: 3

Anachronism Award: Anna Tatangelo. In 2006 she "sings" a line like "being a woman doesn't just mean filling a miniskirt". The disturbing thing is that this line was written by Mogol who, perhaps, forgets that years ago there were those who sang "we are women, besides the legs there's more"! Rating: 0

Deaf Jury Award: Mario Venuti & Arancia Sonora. A singer I infinitely appreciate. Great song, great performer. Obviously, they eliminated him right away! Rating: 5

Best Duet of the Century Award: Michele Zarrillo. With Tiziano Ferro. What a moment of high Italian music! Rating: 1

Boredom Award: Zero Assoluto. More than waking up in the morning, they put you to sleep! And then with that "turuturututtu" Italian cries out for revenge! Rating: 0... absolute!...

and finally:

Save Yourself Award: Italian Music!!