The Velvet Underground
The Velvet Underground & Nico

THE REVIEW

If you are among those who believe that “The Velvet Underground & Nico” is one of the most beautiful albums in the history of music, get ready to read a review that you won’t like but, which I hope will give you some food for thought. If you are among those who don’t love it, I just want to say that you’re not alone.

Intrigued by all the stars (I mean those from both "professional" and non-professional reviews) surrounding this album, I decided to listen to it on YouTube. I had no intention of downloading it (I still partly respect the music industry) nor of buying it: it would be like buying a dress without trying it on.

The first few seconds of listening surprised me with a smile on my face, recognizing the first song “Sunday Morning” and, in a way, raising my expectations. I thought: not a bad start. It is indeed a very enjoyable song that provides a feeling of sweet swaying.

But as I continued listening, there are only two tracks that don’t leave me completely indifferent: “Femme Fatale” and “Venus in Furs.” The first one convinces me with its melody and, even though “Nico’s” voice sounds “affected” to me (perhaps it’s just her way of singing), it is well-interpreted. The second one, however, has something hypnotic about it. Everything else is not worth it. In fact, I’ll tell you more: it becomes at certain points even annoying to the ears.

The first listen of the album bored me. A second listen, however, not only confirmed what I wrote above but also that if critics elevate this album as fundamental to rock music (and part of the audience - the self-proclaimed cultured one - follows them) they do so because they stopped listening to music for the pleasure of doing so long ago.

Because that's precisely the crux of the matter. Writing that this is the best album because it contains the seeds of punk, noise, and whatever else, means, in my opinion, taking away music's primary role: its ability to be a vehicle of beauty and truth.

Moreover, in this album, I feel all the patina of time. If it were truly as beautiful as everyone says, it should defy the laws of time and sound timeless to the ears.

And furthermore, if the reason it's considered fundamental is that it paved the way for punk rock and noise, I ask you: what contribution have these musical genres given to music in general (thus also considering classical music)? Acquiring roughness and harshness (if not downright ugliness) at the expense of sweetness and harmony? If you then want to define it as the best in rock ‘n’ roll, I'm sure there’s better.

What I want to tell you is to listen. Listen with your ears and your heart. Don’t be swayed by what the critics say. Somewhere I read that those hundred who had bought this album had become critics. (source: “Brian Eno”?) I’d like to know how people come to say such nonsense. The stories are either two: “Brian Eno” spoke with the hundred people who bought this album, or 100 critics pretend to be cool, claiming to understand music sooner and better than others.

Don’t be influenced. Art is not for the few. True art is immediate, you just need to approach it from the start, from childhood. Music must be beautiful; it must shake your insides and give you chills of pleasure. Can you tell me what’s beautiful about a distorted guitar and a raped piano?