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I was with my girlfriend and she says, "Ah Gnegno, you're sweet but I want to do my own things, you lack experience, interests, you don't know anything, and I'm tired. You're always there wanting to hook up, but I'm evolved, intelligent, beautiful, cultured. I have friendships and I can't keep wasting time with you, who can't even roll a joint on your own. Gnegno, I AM BREAKING UP WITH YOU." So I went to Brutus, my friend who's grounded because he's a fool. And what does being a fool have to do with anything? It has to do with when his parents were at Ikea and got lost, and he took black gate paint and painted his room like a violent black to which Parent 1 took offense because it clashed with the Louis XIV decor, so then
since he has a PlayStation and they didn't take that away from him, I went to his house. The room is as black as my sister's cat's butt, the one that never grooms itself, and I say, "Ah Brutus, your room smells like the cat's litter box," and he goes, "Personality, dude, what do you want?" and I say, "Nothing, Gnegna says I just want to hook up, and she wants to have her own experiences," so he tells me, "Help me paint the room white because mom got scabies, and I'll tell you what to do with Gnegna." Then he pulls a CD out of a studded trunk and says, "I stole this from my cousin," and plays this CD that screamed and made the window panes rattle, and I say, "Don't you have neighbors?" and he goes, "They're dead; if they climb the stairs, they have a heart attack," so he plays this CD talking about satanic stuff with murdered bodies and all the blood splattering left and right, up and down, with ugly skulls and tongues out, double bass and distorted guitars. I don't understand a thing about Anglicisms, but I immediately felt better.
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