Of Whales and Woe

the bowels gurgle a bit more these days it seems
and he thinks more about the way he saunters 'round
the posture of his father is not his chosen destination
but though his head remains in the same proximity
his chin with creeping dangle moves closer to the ground

he aims his good ear best he can towards conversation and sometimes leans in awkward toward your seat
and if by chance one feels their space too invaded
then try your best to calmly be discreet


because this septic breathed man that stands before you
is a champion from days gone by

and the tales of whales and woe off his liquored toungue will flow
the light will soft white twinkle off the cataracts in his eye
so if by chance you're cornered near the bathroom
or he blocks you sprawled in his aisle seat
embrace the chance to hear some tales of greatness
'cause he is the most interesting ball of toxins you're ever apt to meet

Intro
The Phantom Patriot (Repeat)

Verse 1
Creeping ever creepy
Like a fox in the night
Turning wrongs into right
He boldly works alone
With a crossbow on his shoulder
And a saber at his side
His brand is guns and knives
His mask is white as bone.

Bridge
The Phantom Patriot (Repeat)
He's come to save the day
The Phantom Patriot (Repeat)
He's come to save the day
Yes he's come to save the day. (So desperately the way)

Verse 2
Walking through the compound


With a formulated plan
?There'd had? been so a man
At this decisive point in time
The Bohemians at The Grove
Don't see it quite the same
Smelling danger in his game
They dub his quest a crime.
(Bridge)

Verse 3
Searching for his query
Through the elite redwood maze
He's walked provisioned ?for forty? days and nights
He must remain alert
And though it's not intended
Our hero soon is apprehended
With "Phantom Patriot" in sharpie
Written boldly cross his shirt.
(Bridge)

I got me an Iowan gal
You should see my Iowan Gal.
I got me an Iowan gal.
You may try to win her, but you never will pal, my purebred, cornfed Iowan gal.

I got me an Iowan gal.
She's pretty as a picture, happy as a clam
, pinch me and tell me how lucky i am, you may try to win her but you never will pal, my purebred, cornfed Iowan gal.

I got me an Iowan gal.
Well you should see my Iowan gal.


I got me an Iowan gal.
She's got a round bottom i like to spank, she quilt me up a kashmir blanket, pretty as a picture, happy as a clam
, pinch me and tell me how lucky i am, you may try to win her but you never will pal, my purebred, cornfed Iowan gal.

I got me an Iowan gal.
Well you should see my Iowan gal.
I got me an Iowan gal.
She's the sweetest thing in this side of Des Moines, she cooks up a mighty fine pork loin. So hop a airplane, catch a train pal, get youself cornfed Iowan gal.

You should see my Iowan gal.

I like the rumble of the diesel and the smell of the oil
I percolate my coffee off the radiator boil
I been chasin' tuna nearly 27 years
I got the eyeballs of an eagle but there's ringing in my ears

I like the rumble of the diesel and the smell of the oil
Granddad was a farmer but I couldn't stand the soil
I like to keep it simple; it helps to keep me sane
I like floating in the ocean it nullifies the pain

Some say we can find a place
Between heaven and hell
Some work to make the bread rise
I like to plow the ocean swell
Errol's got a sweet monterey
Rigged for salmon and crab
Never had a family
Unless you count that old yellow lab

I like the rumble of the diesel and the smell of the oil
I percolate my coffee off the radiator boil
I been chasin' tuna nearly 27 years
I got the eyeballs of an eagle but there's ringing in my ears



I like the rumble of the diesel and the smell of the oil
Granddad was a farmer but I couldn't stand the soil
I like to keep it simple; it helps to keep me sane
I like floating in the ocean it nullifies the pain

Lookin' back to '95
I had a fresh Cummings re-power
Draggin' lines for Albacore
'Till the market went sour
We talked of strike for 40 days
'Cause the price was drove down
And when we finally settled up
We got less than a dollar a pound

I like the rumble of the diesel and the smell of the oil
I percolate my coffee off the radiator boil
I been chasin' tuna nearly 27 years
I got the eyeballs of an eagle but there's ringing in my ears

I like the rumble of the diesel and the smell of the oil
Granddad was a farmer but I couldn't stand the soil
I like to keep it simple; it helps to keep me sane
I like floating in the ocean it nullifies the pain