Jay Lee
Zombie Strippers

Warnings:
1: This is not a movie, it is an anarchic and self-indulgent joke.
2: Sometimes it's better not to watch a movie, this is the case with "Zombie Strippers".
3. The rating given is purely indicative, we are talking about trash, my five probably equals your zero.
4. It's not a pornographic movie, (to avoid any misunderstanding, let me point out that I said it's NOT a pornographic movie), but if you want to watch it, do it when mom and dad are not home: they wouldn't understand.
5. You probably won't understand either.

The title is clear: zombies and strippers, or rather zombie strippers.

Basically, the government has developed the usual zombifying virus. Mercenaries are hired to test the zombies' resistance and one of them gets infected. This poor unlucky guy escapes shocked and finds himself in a strip club (who hasn’t ever wandered aimlessly, entered the first door they found on the street, and ended up among sweaty breasts and thighs? Well, that's never happened to me, indeed...).
Once inside, he passes the virus (mind you, the plot of this movie doesn't mean shit) to the first dancer of the show who instead of tearing all the horny patrons to pieces decides to go back to the pole and dance like a goddess, arousing and charging loads of dollars from the drooling audience. From this moment on, the other strippers want to be transformed into the undead too, so they can be more alluring, earn more money, feel fulfilled, and spread gore and splatter throughout the movie. And then blah blah blah and even more blah: if you want to see the movie, go ahead because honestly, I don't see who, in front of zombie strippers, could also expect a plot.
 
What else Jay Lee has done, I honestly don't know, but it’s not that important to compile a filmography of the director of this particular work. Suffice to say he surely knows how not to take himself seriously, not even for a minute and knows how two zombie strippers would fight (pulling each other's hair? Too easy. Biting until exhaustion? That’s what zombies still wearing clothes and without silicon breasts do. Two zombie strippers can only shoot at each other with golf and billiard balls. How do they shoot them? I can't tell you, they would censor me, but watch the movie and at the right moment, between one laugh and another, you'll find yourself standing and shouting: "But this is the biggest bullshit ever conceived! Jay Lee, you’re a fucking genius!").

If you're still wondering why to watch "Zombie Strippers", here are (another) five excellent reasons:

1: There's Jenna Jamson (yes, the one who makes the movies that Catholics say are wrong, but then as soon as you turn around, they watch them, drooling like rams during mating season) who dances completely naked covered in blood and a hole in her trachea for 3/4 of the movie.
2: Lots of other hotties act in it ("ooooo but I don't watch a movie for the chicks, you're so ignorant!". Reread the first warning: this is NOT a movie).
3: Robert Englund acts in it; and he acts with his face!!! For the less informed: this is Robert Englund, and this is Robert Englund with his face)
4: There are lots of weapons both at the beginning and at the end of the movie (in the middle, only boobs and blood) and they are all strictly fake; when they shoot, the flame effect is so cheap that it makes an entire row of chairs laugh out loud.
5: The line from the new stripper "Can you tell I'm new to the job? I'm doing it for grandma, for her colostomy." is priceless.

On the other hand, if you want five reasons not to watch "Zombie Strippers", I'd say the list above works just fine.

In conclusion, "Zombie Strippers" is a movie that from start to finish keeps telling the viewer: "This is a crappy movie, have fun" then it's obviously up to the viewer whether to get caught up in the madness of the film or to get up from their seat after fifteen minutes; what is certain is that if you’ve seen even just one Italian Christmas movie in your life, and you can’t make it to the end of this, you're an idiot. Yes, I just called you an idiot, no point looking like that, look around, you’re the only one who got offended, that means you are.