•
Rating: "A band without talent can easily entertain fools with a stupid puppet show."
That's how Green Jelly present themselves in their debut album, and there's no better phrase to represent them.
A talentless bunch that traversed the nineties bringing along a caravan of exaggerated papier-mâché characters, numerous giant phalluses, and a lot of noise made of heavy metal, trash, and alternative rock.
So exaggerated and vulgar that they end up being as likable as or perhaps more than their epigones Gwar, and capable of even producing a successful single with a sacrilegious stop-motion video like "Three Little Pigs," which was heavily rotated even in our regions at the time.
Capable of quoting, covering, and even plagiarizing Sex Pistols, Metallica, Motorhead, Ministry and Danzig (sometimes within the same track), they deliver their best shots here in the already mentioned single, as well as in the "hype" "Electric Harley House (Of Love)" (with an entire solo of "Enter Sandman" incorporated) and in the bewildering "Trippin' On XTC," a sort of funky-rap acid experiment (something the Red Hot Chili Peppers would be ashamed to release) with a dark and stentorian break that sounds like hearing good old Uncle Danzig say "yes Jesus Christ... yes, it's cute."
And if all this theater isn't enough for some of you, you can always take refuge in the ninth track, "House Me Teenage Rave," and enjoy a fellatio/orgy/sadomasochistic torture that honestly leads to a part of the album that's easily forgettable.
Tracklist and Lyrics
01 Obey The Cowgod (03:10)
Are you ready to obey the cowgod?
We live in a country, we can't eat meat
Obey the cowgod
We live in a country, where there is no, there's no Burger Kings
Obey the cowgod
We live in a country, where there is no, there's no McDonalds
Obey the cowgod
Ah dopey, dopey, dopey, dopey
I'm a cow, and I'm gonna roam through your village
And I'm gonna eat all of your food
But you don't care, because I'm a, I'm a sacred cow
Obey the cowgod
We live in a country, where there is no, there's no Beefcake The Mighty
Obey the cowgod
We live in a country, where there is no, there's no beef-by products
Obey the cowgod
You, on your knees
You, get on your knees
Where's those two boneheads?
Get on your knees
Hands behind your heads
And on your knees
You, on your knees
You, get on your knees
I said, on your knees
Get on your knees and pray to the cowgod
Eat my burger, for it is my flesh
And drink my milk, for it is my blood
Obey the cowgod
04 Three Little Pigs (05:53)
(Spoken)
Why don't you, sit right back,
and I, I may tell you, a tale.
A tale of three, little pigs,
and a BIG, BAD, WOLFFF.
Well the first little piggy, well he was kinda hick.
He spent most of his days, just a dreamin of the city.
And then one day, he bought a guitar.
He moved to Hollywood, to become a star.
But, living on the farm, he knew nothing of the city.
Built his house out of straw, what a pity.
And then one day, jammin on some chords,
along came the wolf, knocking on his door.
(Chorus)
Little Pig, Little Pig, let me in.
NOT BY THE HAIR OF MY CHINNY, CHIN, CHIN!!
Little Pig, Little Pig, let me in.
NOT BY THE HAIR OF MY CHINNY, CHIN, CHIN!!
Well I'm huffin, I'm puffin, I'll blow your house in.
Huffin, puffin, blow your house in.
Huffin, puffin, blow your house in.
Huffin and a puffin and I'll blow your house in!!!
Well the second little piggy, well he was kinda stoked.
He spent most of his day just in ganja smokin.
Huffin and a puffin down on Venice Beach.
Getting paid money for religious speech.
He built his shelter from what he garbage picked.
Mostly made up of old cans and sticks.
Then one day he was cranking out Bob Marley,
and along came the Wolf on his big bad Harley.
(Chorus)
Well the third little piggy, the grade A student.
His daddy was a rock star, named Pig Nugent.
Earned his Masters Degree, from Harvard College.
Built his house from his architect knowledge.
A tri-level mansion, Hollywood Hills.
Daddy's rock stardom, paid for the bills.
And then one day came the old house smasher
the BIG BAD WOLF THE LITTLE PIGGY SLASHER.
(Chorus)
Well the big bad Wolf,
well he huffed, and he puffed, all that he could.
And low and behold the little piggy's house stood.
"IT'S MADE OUT OF CONCRETE!" the little piggy shouted.
The wolf just frowned, as he pouted.
So they called nine-eleven, like any piggy would.
The sent out RAMBO, just as fast, as they could.
(Rambo)
"YO, WOLF-FACE, I'M YOUR WORST NIGHTMARE, YOUR ASS IS MINE!!!"
Well the wolf fell dead as you can plainly see.
So thats to end the story, for you and me.
If you still give a listen, you just may, here a big wolf or little piggy say.
(Chorus)
"And the moral of the story is, ' A band with no talent can easily amuse
idiots, with a stupid, puppet show."
07 Anarchy In The U.K. (03:28)
Anarchy in bedrock, twitch twitch.
[one, two, three, four]
Right now, hahaha..
I am an antichrist
I am an anarchist,
know what I want,
but know how to get it.
want to destroy, mr. slate,
cause I wanna be Fred Flintstone
Anarchy in bedrock,
stop it sometime it makes betty and wilma,
try some flint upside down rubble bubble,
or you can just try fruity pebbles,
cause I wanna be fred flintstone.
in bedrock its the only way to be.
many ways to get what you want,
I use ministry, I use barny rubbles,
I use anarchy,
cause I wanna be, fred flintstone, YA BA DA BA DOO!!
Is this the USPA,
is this holywood,
is this bedrock,
I thought it was hollyrock,
cause I wanna be fred flintstone,
and I wanna be fred flintstone,
and I wanna be fred flintstone.
Wilma!
09 Trippin' On XTC (03:42)
Hello, little children, come stand over here,
I'm gonna shake it with the hot groove a-right in my ear,
Yeah, you're boppin' down Melrose in Daddy's new car,
I'm gonna hit you in the nose, and hit you real hard,
So I jumped on the bandwagon, big butt toe wagon,
Racka-sacka rose but jammin' in your butt,
Wait for Ted bass, fuckin' up your face,
And the rock out, threw the pub out, gonna wip my multiple sack out,
We are trippin' on XTC, hedgin' in our defect sexuality,
Don't you wanna bang us? Wanna be like me? We are trippin' on XTC,
Now, livin' in, livin' in, livin' in now (halluconagal genius)
Are you boys on drugs??
Yeah, Jesus Christ, yeah, he is nice, yeah, Jesus Christ, yeah, he is nice,
Huh! Sly, let's do it, let's do it (??????????)
I'm never coming down.
Now I lay me down to sleep, I pray the Lord my soul to keep,
If I die before I wake, I pray the Lord my soul to take.
10 Misadventures Of Shitman (03:07)
What is that smell???
Walking through the plant today, scooping up what gets away,
It's poo poo, poo poo,
Something's smelling pretty ripe, coming from that sewer pipe,
It's poo poo, poo poo,
You know, everybody knows who can smell it with their nose,
It's poo poo, poo poo,
I've got poo poo on my shoe, I've got poo poo on my shoe,
It's poo poo, poo poo,
But first, you gotta...
You gotta, you gotta, got to, got to, got to, got to, got to, got to, got to,
SHITMAN!
Lemme, lemme, lemme, lemme, lemme, lemme, lemme,
SHITMAN!
Don't gimme, don't gimme, don't gimme, don't gimme, don't gimme no,
SHITMAN!
Come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on shit.
He's got poo poo
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