ajejebrazorf

The fart record already exists, I swear I've heard it... don't ask me the author, I’m not lucky enough to know who that genius is.

and who cares?

Thank you Easy, you know that for these things we agree ;)

Yes, Angelo is frightening, at the limits of humanity not only for the technique but also for the hairstyle. I know he had raped a fourteen-year-old... Michael Angelo, what a charming lout...

And are those who are just banging on the keyboard? Look, the world is full of hyper-fast pickers, perhaps even more than Malmsteen: and fortunately unknown to the majority. It feels like watching Ken the Warrior; who will be the next monster to face? Anyway, do you know who Rusty Cooley is? And Francesco Fareri, our personal hyper-virtuoso? These two idiots have a technique on the edge of human ability, Cooley undoubtedly superior in alternate picking compared to Malmsteen, while Fareri, aside from his picking, has a terrifying sweep and is technically superior to Malmsteen as well. And there are not just these techniques: have you ever heard Adrian Legg's stratospheric arpeggios? Have you ever heard the late Michael Edge use the guitar like an orchestra, pounding on the body, making multiple rhythms at the same time, creating harmonics and tapping? Have you ever listened to Stanley Jordan taking tapping technique to the extreme (Van Halen is a novice in comparison), playing the guitar like a piano? Do you know that idiot Michael Angelo? Just out of curiosity, take a look at the websites of Fareri and Cooley, where the videos are, and verify what I said. That said, this technique is of no use unless the guitar becomes an Olympic specialty. And what does it mean that a true musician plays without effects? Because great composers (classical, I suppose) didn't use them? They didn't even have electric power, let alone effects! Composers of the classical 20th century used a ton of electronics! And electronic music was born right in the classical realm! A machine can go hundreds of times faster and more accurately than any virtuoso, if it were to serve any purpose...
Oh, I almost forgot, Malmsteen's reinterpretations of classical themes are as much classical music as Rondo Veneziano. Nothing.
Another point: Malmsteen may be a great virtuoso, but in terms of musical preparation, he's a DOG. His phrasing is pedestrian; he has no idea how to create tension in a musical phrase. He just puts one note after another as quickly as possible (and often loses the beat, but he's so fast that you hardly notice). He has no idea what harmonic substitution is, he doesn’t know how to use chords. He knows very few scales, he drones on with the harmonic minor (you can hear Paganini all over it). He doesn’t know the styles, while many guitarists today can effortlessly switch from bluegrass to bebop, atonal music to blues, from classical to noise, from flamenco to bossa nova. His conception of music is entirely the same as that of a lobotomized bodybuilder.

Hi Easy!

Ah, then Zappa's brilliance is a matter of opinion: he’s amazing, but in that list I've included Miles, Ligeti, Messiaen, Buckley, Arvo Pärt, and now I’m adding Roby Wyatt...not exactly nobodies.

I am 25 years old. The first albums from some of those I've mentioned: Nick Cave released his under his own name in '84. Slint's first was in '88. Hash Jar Tempo '97. Amon Tobin '98 (I'm not sure). Spring Heel Jack have 3 great albums (2001, 2002, 2004). The Black Tape gave their masterpiece in '97. Lisa Germano in '94. Lycia in '95 (I think, I'm going from memory). The Dirty Three in '98 and in 2002. The Swans started in the '80s. Is that enough? And then it doesn't mean anything: albums aren't eggs; they don't go bad... ;)

Larrok, that joke about shit was just a joke, don’t get stuck on the finger...that I don’t like the Dream (anymore, for years, but I know them) is absolutely true. If you want some nice names to insult, you can look at my comments above (a discussion between me, Easycure, and Stormino). Here are some of my musical preferences: Tim Buckley, Albert Ayler, Residents, Sun Ra, Miles Davis, Velvet Underground, Suicide, Slint, Hash Jar Tempo, Amon Tobin, Schulze, Steve Roach, Spring Heel Jack, Gun Club, Black Tape for a Blue Girl, Swans, Lycia, Nick Cave, Nico, Tom Waits, Frank Zappa, Van Morrison, Lisa Germano, Beefheart, Dirty Three, Ligeti, Arvo Part, Messiaen, and many others: in Italy very few: CCCP, Area, Uzeda, Picchio dal Pozzo, Elio, the singer-songwriters (what a waste, what a show...)

Stepd, apart from the joke, I didn't just say Dream Theater sucks (read much further up, go check it out): and I share the discourse on the subjectivity of emotions up to a certain point; if you want, I can explain how I see it. Then: it’s not bad, I think there are some critiques, the Debaser site works also because it's an opportunity for comparison: then sometimes these reduce to "fucking metalheads!" against "The Dream are better than all the shitty bands you listen to, bastard", but also wonderful "asshole, I'll kick your ass" and everything boils down to a "fish market," as someone called it, it's true, but it's also a game; with that in mind, check out the wonderful duets between Matteo_Brutal and I think NickGhostDrake, with the latter trying to get the former (who is into Grind, Death, and assorted gruesomeness) to listen to some Coltrane...and then jokingly, metal (like hip hop and some other genres) is a very closed environment: isn’t it better to compare with people who also listen to different things, or do you want to keep "sucking each other off" (to quote Pulp Fiction) like in industry magazines?