Voto:
Doctor, Doctor, my grandfather is in the car and he feels unwell. Raise the antenna.
A lady at the sexologist: - L: Doctor, when I make love, I feel like crying! - D: Explain better, ma'am... - L: You see, you should cooperate to explain it better... - D: Look, this is a serious office - L: But Doctor, it’s just to explain better, but be gentle... - D: Is this okay? - L: Yes, doctor, but a little deeper... - D: Like this? - L: More, doctor... - (the doctor progressively penetrates) - L: More... - (same) - L: More... - (same) - L: More... - D: But there’s no more... ... and the lady starts crying...
There’s a boy, kind of ugly, typical "loser" look, who goes to the doctor: "Doc, there's a problem" and the doc says "go ahead." The loser says: "Well, I’m a hermaphrodite... yes, the one with both sexes!!" The doctor, panicking, says: "Really!! In 20 years of work, this has never happened to me... let me see!!" The loser takes off his pants, removes his underwear and the doctor says: "But I only see the male sex... where’s the female one??" The loser replies: "It’s right here!!" (pointing at his head!!)
Doctor, doctor, my liver hurts!!! Do you drink?? And we drink!!!
"Doctor, Doctor, hurry, my son swallowed a thumbtack!" and the doctor says: "No problem, think that when I was young I swallowed a needle from a record player and nothing happened, nothing happened..."
Asylum: the doctor tests three of his patients. He takes them near an empty pool and tells them: now guys, one at a time, give me a nice dive! Antonio, one of the three, climbs the ladder of the diving board, gets to the top, looks down and then jumps... the doctor thinks: This one is really crazy. It’s Franco’s turn: he climbs the diving board ladder, looks down once, a second time, and finally he jumps too... crazy too, the doctor comments. Lastly, it’s Pasquale... he goes up the ladder, looks down from the diving board, looks again, looks again, and finally decides not to jump. He comes down from the diving board and approaches the doctor, who asks him: Good job Pasquale, but tell me why you didn’t jump? Doctor, doctor, I didn’t have my swimming cap, I’m not stupid!
Doctor, I eat pasta I poop pasta, I eat ravioli I poop ravioli, what should I do........the doctor says: "Eat shit."
An elderly man goes to the doctor: "Doctor, I can't pee anymore." And the doctor replies: "How old are you?" The old man says: "92 doctor"......." you’ve already peed enough!!!"
A gentleman with a tapeworm goes to the doctor and the doctor says: I HAVE A VERY EFFECTIVE THERAPY: TOMORROW BRING TWO BREADSTICKS AND AN OLIVE! So the gentleman obeys and the doctor sticks them in his anus, first the two breadsticks and then the olive. This scene is repeated for many days in a row and the worm absorbs everything. Then one day the doctor says: TOMORROW BRING ME 2 BREADSTICKS AND A HAMMER. The astonished gentleman obeys, and the next day the doctor puts the two breadsticks in his anus and then, with the hammer in hand, waits. The worm comes out and goes: AND THE OLIVE???? The doctor: BAM!
A woman has just given birth when the doctor takes the newborn, throws it against the wall, kicks it two or three times in the butt, hangs it on the wall, and does a scalpel throw, and finally, throwing it to the ceiling, rips off its little arms. The mother screams and cries: "My baby, you’re hurting my baby, you’re killing him, stop, I beg you..." The doctor says: "April Fool’s... it was already born dead!"
One day a black boy goes to the doctor because he wants to become white. Arriving at the office, he presents himself and asks: - Excuse me, Doctor Rossi, as you can see, I have dark skin and I would like to become white. - At this point, the doctor advises him to drink half a liter of milk a day for a week. After this period, he returns again: - Listen, doctor, I drank half a liter of milk as you said but it didn’t work. - You - replies the doctor, - drink 1 liter a day for a week, and if th
