Hetzer

You still haven't understood that if you want to provoke, you really need to have something to say, and above all, you shouldn't start with "this review is not a provocation"??
Good God, it's such a simple concept...

The invaluable and serene innocence of not even knowing what the hell you’re talking about...

Once, these records were reviewed by the masterful @DLF...
Where has he ended up? Why do we have to settle for this prosaic, serious, and incredibly boring examination instead of his writings?
But are you a "new version" of @Vinny Sparrow?
Thank you for the contribution, have a good evening...

Let me understand: all this poroponziponzipo' to "explain" that "Valerian" is a completely forgettable and forgotten little movie? I don’t know...
It was enough to say <<They make Rihanna "act" (I don't know if that's how you spell it, I’m just throwing the "h" in there) dressed as sperm and there's the pseudo-ecologist ending like in that piece of crap "Avatar">> (it's true, right? I'm not confusing it with other bad films, am I? Because that could be possible...).
One extra star because I like Delevingne..

A review that, besides confirming an inexplicable allergy to punctuation marks and length (we’ve read worse, anyway..), oozes rhetoric, banality, populism & stuff that was already outdated in 2002.. You write a lot (and poorly) to say nothing at all.. If you’re shocked by the fact that "School shootings are the result of all the rot behind a sick and ruthless system," then you haven’t understood, or don’t yet know, what America is.. For heaven’s sake, sometimes we do enjoy reading useless stuff here on debaser, but still, we also like to point it out.. I hope I’ve made myself clear.. Thank you for the contribution and for stopping by, have a good evening..

I grew up (also) with "Tante Storie Per giocare" by Gianni Rodari and later with the Game Books by Dever & Chalk, so the matter of "interactivity" doesn't sound innovative to me at all; on the contrary... The novelty lies in the fact that there will definitely be something to tap on with your little finger on the magic tablet or Phon Phon used as a support. I hope this is just a temporary "finger up the ass" and not a "new" trend: if in a few years I have to struggle to move the story forward myself to watch a movie, then I’ll start to worry! Anyway, I haven't seen it yet; it's on my list, but it annoys me that it seems there's an actor with such a dog-like face that I would feel like slapping him repeatedly for 47 minutes... So, spoiler alert: does interactivity allow you to slap the actors?
To conclude this rant, one note: you say that Netflix "clearly tells you that everything you choose is not a real choice, but just an illusion of choice"... Not at all; there is a choice and it's even too vast: I spend an average of 26 minutes deciding what to watch, and eight times out of ten by the 27th minute, I end up reading a book instead. Finding something that sparks my interest in all that chaos is really difficult for me... The good thing is that lately I’ve been reading a lot more in the evening!

I've read better roastings written much better.. Check out the works of: Rax, talkin' meat, STIPE, and the legendary Il Tarantiniano.. If you refine your style, you could enter the pantheon of the "Gourmets of sh*t reviews"..
Thanks for stopping by, leaving a comment, have a good evening and a happy new year to you and your family, see you next year..

@[Cialtronius] please.. If some de-user likes the intellectual pose, I just throw my arms up..

Once upon a time in here, there was a guy named "Rax"... And there was another guy named "talkin'gmeat"... I strongly recommend (indeed, I really do...) that you go discover who these two genuine, scary monsters of crap were that wreaked havoc here on Debasio, alas, years ago... You might find quite a bit of inspiration.
I remember both of them very well, and that's a good thing... I hope you can keep pouring out your writings, wishing good evening to everyone, thanking those who comment by tearing you apart, moving forward on your admirable, trashy path... Don't pay attention to the mean-spirited critiques, nor to the free low votes; like the ones from guys like me, who read "you appeared to the Madonna...I appeared to my limits" and have to stop and run to the bathroom to take a dump...
Keep on going! Thank you for stopping by, thank you for the valuable contribution, good evening and happy new year to the whole family!

After "La Signora Del Castello," Gigione has never been the same..