Dying Fetus
Infatuation With Malevolence

THE REVIEW

As a professional metalhead, which I consider myself to be, every Friday the 17th of the month I go to my trusted brutal dealer, the one with the tattoo of the angel sodomizing a mussel. I always trust him, never once has he failed to provide me with a masterpiece.
That day, however, a bothersome uncertainty tormented me: I couldn’t decide if I felt more haunting gothic, hard-kitting, or anti-trend metal, and it was driving me insane. So what to buy? "Mutilated Agony" or "Mutilated Mannequins"? Dive headlong into "Drunked Orgy of Destruction" or get carried away by the foul work of "Maleficarum"? Risk it all with "Deafacation" or get brutally punished by the "Legion of Divine Punishment"? Doubt assailed me.
An urge from within was almost pushing me towards the neo-death/grind pop metal masterpiece of "Ultra Vomit", or towards the hometown brutal-grind-death metal "Vomit the Soul", when from afar I was struck: "Periodic Table of the Idiots", the band that hits me straight in the gut.
I read on: it says "bombastic and melodic metal band from Nebraska". Uhm... in fact, I don't think I feel that melodic today. Maybe there’s a mistake.
I start over. I need strong emotions. I let my memories take over. A whiff of syrupy sweetness envelops me. The "Autopy" and "One Last Torture" remind me of my girlfriend when she caresses my heart (from the inside). "Putrefy", instead, reminds me how I’ve always hated extreme sports (for example: washing myself).
Come on, time is ticking... that day was really tough.
"Malediction" or "Maleficarum"? "Social Infestation" or "Temporary Insanity"? "Necrophobic", "Necropolis", or "Necrosity"? "N’satan.com" or "Gorefecation.net"?

In the end, defeated by the events, I go for the safe choice: "Dying Fetus", a thrash/death metal band, simple, no surprises. My trusted brutal dealer nods happily behind his armor of piercings. He tells me: “this stuff is strong, buddy, these guys are too far ahead! May the mussel (taps the tattoo) be eaten by me if I'm not telling the truth. Buddy, here’s what it was: your body wasn’t accepting the inevitable, you woke up thrash/death metal this morning. Nothing else. Go home happy, go’”. He’s so sharp, my brutal dealer, behind his spiked armor.
The album is called "Infatuation with Malevolence". I go home happy.

My favorite is called "Vomiting the Fetal Embryo", because it reminds me of mommy when she used to hit me with the belt. "Kill Your Mother, Rape Your Dog" is so sweet, but my dog doesn’t think so, in fact, he always squirms when I try to pin him down, the bastard always tries to slip away. Yet in the song, the dog doesn’t slip away, that’s strange. "Your Blood Is My Wine" always makes me feel wickedly awesome, the singer yells "your blood is my wine" throughout the song and it’s Tommaso’s favorite (my friend) because he only completed elementary school and when there are too many words he struggles. He was very impressed by my brutal dealer's tattoo, and he wants one, too, with the mussel, I mean. But my friend Tommaso is nice, his favorite is "Wrethched Flesh Impalement" because this song is so avant-garde. He always says metal must evolve, but I don’t understand what he means. And to help me understand, he got the same tattoo as the brutal dealer, and I finally understood, it was a metaphor. The mussel was no longer being sodomized by the angel, they had evolved. Now, they were doing a 69.

P.S.: all the band names listed above are authentic. Have a good life, everyone.