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DeRece Live listening to the album (live).
Whatever comes out, comes out: it's your problem.
But also mine. Especially mine.
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Plei--->
Take a big blender, one of those really large ones.
A model of 20-30 tons should suffice.
Get yourselves the printed phone directory of the Sip (because you won’t find those little numbers on the internet) of your grandparents: the one with names so densely packed that you’d lose 15 diopters out of 16 (a bit like YouPorn but less fun) while searching for the butcher's number to order ham sandwiches, and you’d end up calling the eye doctor instead who, coincidentally, was also friends with the butcher: a classic case of killing twelve birds with half a bean.
Often, though, the doctor ended up eating the sandwiches because the butcher eventually didn’t know to whom he had to deliver the bundle.
I was saying.
I got lost.
Oh, yes.
The big blender.
Then.
In the printed guide, look for the nearest quarry and have six/seven truckloads of various fragmented rubble (known as “Tight Ass Bleeds”) delivered to your home address.
Not too fine, not too coarse.
Or it'll jam.
The big blender.
Now.
Is there a sewage truck nearby that has just completed its vital task?
Great!
Bring that home too: big hose and everything down into the spacious vault of the maxi-blender (known as “Factory of Repression”).
A pinch of salt and a sprinkle of Loretta Goji berries.
For mixing, you know, they’re a gem.
Paranoia by the shovelfuls (“My Life is Shit”).
Tar (“Putrefied Egos - Broken Mirror”). Black would be ideal.
And lots of foam from the mouth.
Even hectoliters (“Basque Blues”).
Even snail foam is fine.
If desired, saltpeter is allowed in the unlikely mélange.
It refines, but it is not strictly necessary.
Now then: blend everything thoroughly and let it thicken for a good solid half-an-hour and a half (yes, it lasts that long, I wasn’t just saying).
All that’s left is to ring the ever-present cathodic bison in cannelloni Canna Vacciuolo and serve still bubbling the authentic, unique, inimitable, indelible “Dialettiche della Merda” produced by Billy Bao in the recently distant 2008.
Let me know.
Possibly.
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