Uffie
Sex Dreams And Denim Jeans

THE REVIEW

When you're hot, you're young, you've seen half the world, and you're rich enough to decide to move permanently to Paris because "you prefer the European lifestyle over the American one" (source Wikipedia), you've probably received a lot from life.

Then if one day you also happen to date a somewhat famous French DJ who teases your dreams of success and produces your first track which becomes an underground hit, then you've definitely been kissed by God.

If then, after hearing your cult track, a French electronic duo decides to have you sing on what will become one of the most significant dance music records of the '00s (if you haven't listened to it yet, you're hopelessly "out". Go fix that), then you realize you've been disgustingly lucky. So why not try to make a whole album, just for fun?

No matter, since you're so lucky, you don't even need to know how to sing! This record manages, indeed, to make the infamous autotune sound almost elegant, even more than the great Imogen Heap!

The first track on this album is the aforementioned hit "Pop The Glock" (2006), an incredibly minimalist booty-shaker: finger snaps as the rhythmic base, deep bass, hyper-vocoded voice and that's it. Few effective elements make it one of the manifestos of hipsterism. Unmissable then, the fantastic related video-clip full of well-dressed indie hipsters with gloriously bored faces (if you feel an extreme disgust don't worry, it's normal, it happened to me too: it's called mega-envy!). In the second track, she informs us how cool she is, Uffie, and well, we knew it, but everyone's good with words, right? And indeed, in the third track who pops up to reiterate that Uffie is a super-cool chick? Who else but Pharrell Williams?

And so on with a series of catchy tracks, soaked in autotune, very danceable (but always to be danced with a bored demeanor, don't forget) but never cheesy. Or at least not cheesy in the American sense: to balance out the protagonist's silliness there are indeed the warm hands of the "French Touch" of excellent producers: Mr. Oizo (the "the puppet"), Mirwais, and Feadz (the boyfriend mentioned above). Sniff their fingers and get intoxicated.

What could be more glamorous, then, than making the title track by inserting a sample of "Rock & Roll" by the Velvet Underground into a fresh electro-hop extravaganza?

Then, maybe, there’s even time for a track that's more than just nice like "First Love": a sugary ballad in full '80s style with danceable, glitter-drenched twists to dance under the stars. Unbelievably kitsch, but it doesn’t matter: you're drunk, you feel beautiful, the perfume intoxicates you and those around you, you've taken off your heels because otherwise you'll collapse to the ground, you feel the damp sand between your black-painted toes, and all you can do is dance, dance, dance, get wasted...and, oops, your head spins, and you fall gently to the ground and laugh. Laugh like never before because it's summer and nothing can harm you if you're young, rich, and have colorful plastic bracelets on your wrists and a pair of condoms in your clutch.

Aaaah, magnifique jeunesse! 

I don't think anyone reading this review will want to buy this frivolous pop record (anyway, honestly made) unless you want to act cool saying "hey, wanna hear the record from the girl in Tthhee Ppaarrttyy?". But, all things considered, it deserves a listen because this is rather fun music that’s a child of our hysterical times in which the talent of one person alone doesn't count for much (in this case, it’s the talent of many) and Uffie knows it and rubs it in our faces splendidly:

"Don't worry if I write rhymes, I write checks"

And with that face, who would ever have the courage to tell her to go to hell?