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Rating: I was in the military, we were doing one of those endless camps in the middle of a forest in the province of Viterbo, they had taken us there to guard the armored vehicles. You'd patrol the perimeter in pairs at night, while everything around slept. We would pass the shift stealing chocolate when we got near the mess tent and shooting the breeze to pass the two appointed hours.
It was on one of those rounds that I ended up with a certain private Gramaglia, I was already a corporal and was about to earn the two stripes of corporal major, so I was having what one might call a short and intense military career. This Gramaglia, whose first name I don't remember (if you happen to be on debaser, say hi), was a little guy with big glasses and teeth, from the province near Naples, or maybe he was already from Avellino. Anyway, the first evening he pulls out his walkman and says to me: capora’, listen to this phenomenon. I put on the headphones and started laughing as I had never laughed in my life, hearing this stuff sung with all the passion that only Neapolitans are capable of.
Title, 'A cinquecento' (I recommend listening to the sample while reading)
Doppo ave' fatto diebbete e cambiali
riuscette a m' accatta' 'na Cinquecento
seconda mano, ma pareva nova
verde pisello e crummature argiento
Moquetta 'nterra, tappetine 'e lusso
sedile ribaltabile, accendino
io m' ha lavavo quase ogni matina
p' o sfizio sulamente d' a guardà
Fari allo jodio, 'nu rilorgio a quarzo
motore ritoccato, steva 'a guerra
ce avevo miso pure 'o Paioneer
nastre, cascette pure 'e Barry White
Che vuò sentì, Carmè? Donna Sumèr?
'nu piezzo 'e John Travolta... Peter Tosh?
Io le mettevo 'e mmane mmiezzo......... 'e mmane
calavo il ribaltabile e vualà
Modestamente, tengo 'nu crick dinto 'a Cinquecento
che aiza pure 'e camion a rimorchio
'stu crick e' 'nu regalo 'e papà mio
me cride? è fatto 'e fierro originale
'Na brutta sera 'a lasso mmiezzo 'a via
ero curruto: mamma steva male
'a metto int' 'o parcheggio d’ 'o 'spitale
e quando scengo nunn' 'a trovo cchiù
Me cride? addeventaie 'na lampa 'e fuoco
'o cuollo s'abbuffaie comme a 'na votte
steva scuppianno pure 'a vena aorta
e 'o core... ‘o core nun c' ha faceva cchiù.
E mò pure Carmela m' ha lassato
pecchè s' hanno arrubbato 'a Cinquecento
s' è misa cu' uno cu' ll'otto e cinquanta
pecchè tene 'e cascette d' Elton John
Scetateve guagliune 'e malavita
dimane 'a Cinquecento hadda sta' ccà!!!
This and other masterpieces, including the immortal Rock dei tamarri, all downloadable from the site, are contained in this wonderful album dating back to 1989 (COPIES SOLD: 15,000 (original) - 1,000,000 (counterfeit), 21 minutes of pure intellectual amusement. And for those interested, there's the official website, from which you can see that our guy has made quite a few records, earning absolutely nothing, of course.
Up the munnezz!!!
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