Frank Zappa
One Size Fits All

After this brief yet significant quote from Uncle Frank, I want to introduce the musicians of the album in question:

Frank Zappa - guitars, vocals on "Po-Jama People", "Evelyn", "Sofa n°2"
George Duke - keyboards, synthesizers, vocals on "Inca Roads", "Andy", "Sofa n°2"
Napoleon Murphy Brock - flute, tenor sax, vocals on "Floerentine Pogen", "Andy"
Chester Thompson - drums
Tom Fowler- bass
Ruth Underwood - vibraphone, marimba, percussion
James 'Bird Legs' Youman - bass on "Can't Afford No Shoes"
Johnny 'Guitar' Watson* - backing vocals
Bloodshot Rollin' Red* - harmonica
(* under these two pseudonyms hides Captain Beefheart, note that Johnny Watson, Zappa's idol, is a blues guitarist).

After the necessary introductions, let's get to the music, with the premise that for me talking about this masterpiece is not easy at all, because it is an album I have known for over ten years and has become part of my DNA, and it’s known there is no worse connoisseur of one's self as oneself. But still, I want to try.

It's the blessed year of 1975, and our hero sets out to record one of the most beautiful albums of his career (and goes without saying that it's also one of the greatest albums of the 1900s).
“One Size Fits All” opens with "Inca Roads", a track that mocks an alleged UFO arrival in the Andes, where the rhythms and sounds are 'other' and Zappa's guitar solo (taken from the Helsinki concert, which will later be released on the CD “You Can't Do That On Stage Anymore Vol. 2”) is there, ready to lead us towards unexplored paths, as if to tell us that Frank is the real extraterrestrial, never mind alien invasions, once the solo ends there's a beautiful interplay of rhythms where Ruth Underwood takes the lead with vibraphone and marimba until reaching a stellar keyboard solo by George Duke, before returning to and concluding the theme.
The second track is an irresistible rock guitar riff supported by a powerful groove and backing vocals typical of Zappa's style.
This leads to "Sofa n°1" (the only instrumental track), a delicate and airy waltz tempo, which will be revisited in the finale with "Sofa n°2" that here will also be sung (including a piece in German!).
"Po-Jama People" is sung by Zappa himself with his typically lower 1/3 octave voice (due to an accident he had a few years earlier, hear the difference with the early albums), this track too is seeped in an unprecedented groove that leads to a really exceptional solo by Frank, enough to make you jump off the couch (ha ha!) for its expressive lucidity and evocative strength.
"Florentin Pogen" is another fantastic piece where lyrical fragments intertwine with fiery rhythms and surprising thematic variations, leaving even the most musically ignorant in awe, the intermezzo 'Chester Gorilla' (dedicated to the drummer) is nothing short of hilarious.
“Evelyn” almost seems like a Bach piece if it weren't for Zappa's irreverent singing.
The next track 'San Ber'dino' is further proof of Zappa's compositional genius, where in addition his scorching and incisive guitar accompanies us throughout the duration of the track, counterpointing its moods.
Thus we arrive at "Andy" another incomparable gem, where with disarming naturalness the 'moustache' draws us into a kaleidoscope of rhythms and sound textures, where his two brief solos are the shining and eloquent example.
The album concludes with the already mentioned "Sofa n°2". In short, an authentic masterpiece: complex structures resting on an apparent melodic simplicity, among fusion and progressive rock as rare as it is unique, all supported by a group of trustworthy and unparalleled musicians.
Because in the end, one size fits all.

"For every kind of music, there are listeners who think journalists don't know what they're talking about and these listeners, when they become passionate about a band or a musical genre, will fight hard to defend them. THESE ARE THE PEOPLE WHO HAVE GIVEN ME THE OPPORTUNITY TO STAY IN THE MUSIC WORLD ALL THESE YEARS, AND FOR THIS, I THANK THEM".
Frank Zappa

And I, DanteCruciani, Charley Ellroy, Pretazzo, dreamwarrior, ptr, chicolini, Stràfiko Piezzecore, Luca, Fagen85, . . . damn. . . (and many others) THANK YOU FOR EXISTING,
THANKS AGAIN, UNCLE FRANK!