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It was already well-known that Italian music was in De Filippi's hands, yet it remains terribly unsettling how one can dig deeper even after hitting rock bottom, as proven by the Kolors, the latest boy-band made by Mediaset. The characteristics and skills of this wonder trio are primarily a propensity for plagiarism, the almost nonexistent depth of the lyrics (written in English, just for some disguise) and the ability to rewrite the same song 11 times and release 11 different new tracks (KekkoModà docet).
After the introduction of Out, which is as memorable as a child’s declaration after a half-hour rant (with attached insults) by Vittorio Sgarbi, we begin with the "summer hit" of 2015, Everyone, the most loved single by the modest and devoted Italian teenagers, a song primarily based on endless vocal exercises that serve as fillers for a track that manages to plagiarize 90% of Maroon 5’s repertoire (not that it required much, considering their originality not much higher than that of Modà), along with Starz in their Eyes by Just Jack and If I Ever Feel Better by The Phoenix. Then comes Why Don't You Love Me? The title alone represents more than 50% of a text that’s anything but repetitive, it should be explained to the failed clone of Freddie Mercury, who goes to the same hairdresser as Justin Bieber, that in order to write a love song, one should also explain why this love ended like any relationship starring Raffaella Fico, instead of limiting oneself to a pathetic series of "Why?".
Going forward, the situation doesn’t seem to improve, after My Queen (random vocal exercises pt.2), we perhaps reach the most beautiful song of the album (as much as the thing can be compared to choosing the best among various deadly executions proposed), Me Minus You seems to start well, with an excellent introduction on the piano, all very exciting until Stash’s voice kicks in, breaking the "poetry" of the track much like Giampiero Galeazzi breaking a wooden chair he's sitting on. The lyrics would even be "acceptable," if it didn't descend into nauseating repetitiveness after the first half of the song, while the arrangement, which seemed to start well, devolves into piano chords as appropriate as swearing during Christmas mass.
After that, the album continues along the lines of the previous tracks (always characterized by some plagiarism here and there), notable is a duet with the new slave of record labels, Elisa, Realize, which one cannot precisely understand what style it intends to reach, until reaching the peak of musical abomination, track number 10: Love (the title says it all). A thing that not even a fusion of the most saccharine Biagio Antonacci, the most monothematic Eros Ramazzotti, and the most plagiarizing Tiziano Ferro (or Zucchero, for those of old school) would ever manage to produce, all characterized by a vocal interpretation of the Chester Bennington of "noantri" worthy of some third-rate American show outside the protected zone, and a significant series of plagiarisms. The album also includes two more tracks, Twisting follows practically the same structure of any Kolors song, the last one, It's Up to You, represents the second part of Me Minus You, which we have already discussed enough.
Thus ends an album that represents the average level of Italian music and its listeners, a worthy representation of a musical movement once among the most renowned in the world, now degenerated into cheap tunes, ridiculous lyrics, and pathetic attempts to mimic American boy bands and their already pathetic pop idols.
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