Strung Out
Songs Of Armor And Devotion

Let's pretend this isn't the Year of Our Lord 2019, or, if you prefer, that they aren't about to celebrate their 30th year of activity.
Let's pretend for a moment that instead of being in the presence of veterans, we are talking about a newbie band determined to bring the title of melodic punk-hc champions back to its permanent center of gravity, snatching it from some daredevil Canadian, Brazilian, Northern European or any other unlikely origin.
Let's put aside everything we know about Strung Out and their career of highs and lows that have traced their sinusoidal path.
Let's try to ignore news as seismic as the change behind the skins from Jordan Burns to Robert Shankle (formerly of Runaway Kids(???)) after two decades of honorable and faithful service, about which no official explanation has been provided, but reading between the lines of the February 2018 statement, it seems it was not a friendly separation.

An effort not to be underestimated, I acknowledge.
Yet, in light of my previous listening experiences regarding the 5 from Simi Valley, I don't feel inclined to recommend a different mindset to approach this "Songs Of Armor And Devotion".
Skepticism? Quite the opposite
Ill-concealed distrust? Far from it.
Especially since the single "Daggers", released last June, remains insipid until you take it for what it is: a sustained, super clean, super technical melodic hardcore piece with a decent vocal line, just excessively diluted in a 4:07 duration that is a bit taxing.

And if the key is precisely to take things for what they are, pretending that what you put on isn't just another studio work by Jason Cruz (speaking of Canadians) and company, it wouldn't be a crime.

Ready, set, go! and "Rebels And Saints" opens the show for the newcomer's drumming and immediately showcases the goods, reminiscent of the flatlined blonde from any teen movie in the "they don't make them anymore" series: everything very catchy, everything too good to be true, you want to scream before even halfway through the track that pop-punk has finally found its rightful contemporary manifesto.
However, things suddenly fall apart in the second part, the blonde reveals herself for what she is, the premises fade and the situation deflates. Cliché.
Not a great start.

And unfortunately for us, neither "Ulysses" with its mannerisms for their own sake, nor the intangible "Under the Western Sky" are remotely akin to the "choir girl". Things are looking bad for our somewhat unlucky protagonist.

The plot suddenly livens up with the appearance of "Monuments", a sort of dad with a heart of gold, yet as inappropriate as he is wise. He does his part, trying to reassure us that it's just a matter of patience, that everything will be fine but paradoxically causes more harm than good and at the end of an embarrassing conversation, he also instills a certain performance anxiety.

Fortunately, there are friends:"White Girls" is the one who always knows what to do, "Demons" is the jerk who loves himself a lot, "Hammer Down" is the one with a thousand resources, who however hasn't yet learned to poop at school.

The rest of the chapters in this blockbuster give an overview of the many characters populating the high school and meanwhile, not a shadow of the "band girl".
SPOILER: she never shows up.
And like her, the essence of Strung Out is absent, lost in the mirage of what it was, struggling to reach what it wants to be.
Not an idea, not a stir.
A 13-track torment when half would have sufficed.

The premises were clear: take this review for what it is, take this album for what it is.
In both cases, we are knowingly far from adequate.

We tried, pretending was impossible, expectations weren't high so calling ourselves disappointed would even be unfair.

Even the bland blonde, once all that makeup is washed off, turns back into just another one of the many.