Sergio Rizzo, Gian Antonio Stella
La Casta

The reading of this review is not recommended for those with particular gastric, hepatic, or cardiac sensitivities.

Dialogue between an absolutely non-partisan and apolitical Commissioner for the evaluation of governmental efficiency (we wish there were one) and any Italian politician (they're all the same). Simply marked with a "C" for the first and a "P" for the second.

C: "Most Hon., Venerable, Illustrious, Dr., Prof., Hon. Italian Politician, reading the aforementioned book, based on well-founded and irrefutable data, I have found, among other things, that there is a mountain community located in a village of the Taranto area, positioned 39 meters above sea level, precisely in the Murgia Tarantina. What do you have to say about this?"

P: "Commissioner, the community you mentioned earlier here was abolished in 2009, and it was done poorly because now no one can protect the mountain corals, the ibex fish, the elk fish, the deer fish, and the alpine starfish. Do you see what damage you have caused? Nice job, nice job."

C: "Well, and how do you explain that the costs of the Quirinale are four times higher than those of Buckingham Palace? Why have they risen by 91% in the last ten years? And why do the total rental costs of the palaces for the Chamber exceed 650 million euros?"

P: "And what do I know, Commissioner, maybe the Queen keeps everyone on a tight budget at Buckingham Palace, or whatever it’s called there. Do you realize how big the Quirinale is? It's always a hill, a mountain! I don't know a thing about the costs, it’s not my business. But you know that we have to pay all those who work there? And what! Don't they have families too?"

C: "Alright, but paying over 2000 euros in salary to two employees for regulating pendulum clocks seems excessive, don't you think?"

P: "Commissioner, you can't imagine how difficult it is to regulate a pendulum clock. I would never do it. And unscrewing, screwing, turning the key, adjusting with the parallel of Greenwich... it's really tough!”

C: "Greenwich Meridien, anyway. Uhm, I see. It is also highlighted an anomalous record. The use of state aircraft for a total of 37 hours daily. I remind you that a solar day has only 24. How do you explain this? Who uses the State Aircraft and for what reason?"

P: "Aaah, Commissioner, commissioner, you also have to account for the time zones. Go to America for example, it’s 24 hours plus a six-hour time difference and we're already at 30. Add the check-up at the airport, an intermediate stop for a cocktail, a sandwich or a nap, and we quickly reach 37. It’s us using it, with our families, friends, and relatives. You only see America or Japan once in a lifetime and we take advantage."

C: "The check-in. Perfect. The blue cars? Why so many and so luxurious? Why are they used especially by those not entitled? You know that Enrico De Nicola, whom I imagine you know, traveled from Naples to Montecitorio in his car without an escort? And he paid for his calls and stamps out of his own pocket?"

P: "But politicians, secretaries, undersecretaries, and even more sub-secretaries, briefcase carriers, dancers, and troupes get tired going up and down and use state cars and what do you expect. This De Nicola doesn't sound new, but he must have been naïve, sorry. For calls and stamps now we have the internet and the problem is solved."

C: "Mmmh, yes indeed. Tell me, with the very high salaries you receive, you could at least afford luxurious restaurants, yet I find that a small lasagna with white ragù and scamorza costs less than pasta at the garbage collectors' canteen in Venice. How do you explain that? Luigi Einaudi, whom I imagine you know, was worried about sharing a large pear with another diner. What do you think?"

P: "But do you know the pasta they have at the Venetian garbage collectors' canteen? You can't even imagine. Handmade by workforce with centuries of experience from the best intercontinental pasta makers and not. Are you kidding? Maybe I could go eat there. Einaudi who? The one with the books? And how big was that pear really?”

C: "And why, if a parliamentarian is not elected, they absolutely must occupy a seat to avoid losing acquired privileges? Some have even been satisfied with five paychecks."

P: "Eh Commissioner, what can I tell you? It seems that we are essential, necessary, we must be good at our jobs and for this, they always want us. For the rest, don't ask me. I know nothing."

C: "Eh, yes, indeed. And the consultancies? Do you know that former Minister of Justice Castelli appointed a fish wholesaler as a prison building expert? What do you tell me about this?"

P: "Really? I didn't know this. If we think about it, the Minister wanted to help the eco-environment. By recycling fish bones, moss, mollusks, cuttlebone, and shark teeth, with a chemical component, you get reinforced concrete that can't even be knocked down with an atomic bomb. And who gets out of jail then? It saves money and is economical. Smart thinking Minister. Well done!”

C: "Ah, sure, sure. Why do you then 'impose' a pension after just 35 months of Parliament without contribution obligations, or even get more than one, just to round off? There have also been cases where a parliamentarian retired with an annuity at the age of 42 or others who receive it without ever having set foot in Parliament. Additionally, why must an ordinary citizen work 30-35 years to retire at 65 hoping their pension will be paid? Why, beyond the opportunists, if they unjustifiably skip work for a few days, a medical check comes unerringly? Why do they risk dismissal if caught doing other jobs? Hon. Clemente "Weathervane Four Winds" Mastella has been receiving a journalist's pension for years having worked just ten months at Rai before climbing into politics. What do you tell me here?"

P: "One moment Commissioner, but my cell phone is ringing!"

C: "Yes, go ahead. Could you also explain why election reimbursements have been ten times higher than actual expenses? The Pensioners’ Party, which gathers a negligible percentage of voters, received 180 euros in reimbursement for every euro spent. Do you know that a 1993 referendum abolished party funding and any reimbursements? And do you know that in 2006 the South Tyrol Party obtained reimbursements even without preparing the necessary application? How do you explain this?"

P: "Ehm, one moment I can't understand. Do I listen to you or the phone?"

C: "But look, it’s off!”

P: "That's what you say!"

C: "Why are the tax deductions for donations to parties higher than those for non-profit organizations? With this, you can channel more money into your pockets at the expense of needy people. Do sick children dying of hunger have less importance than you, fattened pigs supported by taxpayers’ blood? How many more atrocities do we have to endure?”

P: "Excuse me Commissioner but I have things to do now. Goodbye!"

What has been described is a brief summary of the atrocities, the waste, the absurdities, the madness, the abominations, that Italian politics generates daily. It might seem impossible to you. News and data so true that they seem false. I fear that many of you will have to treat yourselves for an ulcer after reading this book. And it's not a wish.