Peter Jackson
Braindead

What to say about this film... as a keen horror-splatter enthusiast, I searched far and wide for even a single cinematic work that could compete with it, alas without success. So I delved into German productions ("Premutos" by Ittenbach, or the homemade films by Schnaas), the American ones (the legendary Troma or the two "Blood Feast" by H.G. Lewis), and of course Italian ones ("The Beyond" by Fulci or "Medley" by Zarantonello), and while I can say I have discovered little gems of bad taste and rejoice in this, I remain unsatisfied.

Yes, because "Braindead" a.k.a "Dead Alive" (translated here as "Splatters gli schizza-cervelli") is THE MOST SPLATTER FILM EVER MADE!!! That bastard genius Jackson has secured the throne of gore director of the Universe, no punches pulled. This hefty bearded New Zealander (now more famous for the milestone called "The Lord of the Rings" than for his almost underground past) has created a work that achieves the arduous task of making your television bleed, and that's no small feat, trust me. Given the rest of the films of the genre, one might reasonably think "yes, but who knows how crude the special effects are!..". Nothing could be more wrong! It's all so magnificently perfect, so convincing yet at the same time absurdly exaggerated that you couldn't ask for more. Woe to anyone who even mentions computers and all those digital abominations... here we are talking about craftsmanship, tangible effects!

But let's start with the plot: Lionel lives with his domineering mother and is in love with Paquita. One day, while the lovebirds are at the zoo, his mother (who had been stealthily following them) is bitten by a strange rat-monkey after accidentally approaching the cage. From here begins the real massacre: whoever is bitten by that creature dies in excruciating agony, only to reawaken as a zombie. The poor Lionel's attempts to "contain" his mother will be to no avail, as soon all the guests at a party organized by his good-for-nothing uncle at the family villa will be infected. The final scene (the party) is certainly the most explosive, where all the worst fantasies of the splatter-maniac come to life (explaining it in words would lose the strength of the images, but it includes disembowelments, decapitations, explosions, and so on, in a perverse whirlwind that concludes with the use of a lawnmower as a battering ram), but the rest of the film is equally engaging. Setting aside the pseudo-sentimental plot, which serves merely as a pretext to give substance to the characters, the film overflows with hilarious scenes. The comedy is certainly not unintentional; this is a demented film washed in blood and guts, a divine combination in my opinion. The ninja priest, the breakfast with cream, the playground, and many other comic scenes, instead of making the film stupidly trashy like its German colleagues ("Violent Shit" above all), make it enjoyable from start to finish, without boring parts or useless dialogue. Everything here serves the dumb fun and the thirst for blood. In one word: excellent!

A small note on the Italian version: our dubbing, more than being unfaithful, adds several jokes that emphasize certain scenes, and while on one hand they may seem amusing and in line with the film's spirit, on the other hand, they will almost certainly be despised by purists (who may prefer to hear the zombies pant and growl rather than utter questionable exclamations). Personally, I enjoyed them, some of them fit perfectly (pity sometimes for the lack of lip-sync...!) and frankly, I would almost regret their absence now.

In short, who would have ever expected that from a small Pacific island, a guy would put (for now) an end to the search for the most gore (and technically flawless) feature film of all time...

A film that recommending to fans of the most exaggerated horror cinema in every sense would be a superfluous act: those who love or even just appreciate these films cannot have never seen it; it's like a literature scholar who hasn't read the Divine Comedy or The Betrothed.

5 stars are too few, multiply them by a billion to infinity and beyond.