My Dying Bride
Anti-Diluvian Chronicles

THE REVIEW

So... yesterday was my name day, and my friend Ettore, who usually has much more delicate and symphonic tastes, presented me with this delightful box set: My Dying Bride... Anti Diluvian Chronicles.
The cover intrigues me: a little ghost floating up a spiral staircase holding a candelabrum in hand, without being vulgar like the covers of Defecatius Intestinalis et similia but very stylish and old-style... kind of like in Hammer films, remember those? The ones where Vincent Price made terrifying faces screaming: BERENICEEEEEEE!!! Yes, those.
I go home, already feeling a bit like Usher... actually, since I'm at it, I think it's a good idea to pull down the shutters and get into bed, the first time in years that I do this in the afternoon, I grab the stereo remote... and off we go! Here we go!

The beginning with the violins! The beginning with the violins already makes me think... there... I see the pond in front of the Usher house, the old magnate going mad, I see Morella's hair but... wait a minute! What's happening? Who burped? What is this mess? Why is he making those guttural sounds? Did he swallow an entire thrush? Has he eaten too many stuffed olives? Is his backside burning fiercely? Who is he? Why does he have to ruin an atmosphere that in the beginning wasn't wrong at all... okay, okay, I skip! Sometimes the gift of Skipping is very redemptive, especially in these cases, in the presence of artists who, perhaps, need more tracks to express themselves at their best... I skip! But no! Again? He's burping again! And he does it in different modes! Not even I, back in high school when having the contest of downing a liter of beer, modulated in this way! But why is he doing this? What's the need to act like ogres? You're ruining my atmosphere!

By now, I'm not skipping anymore... let's say I'm fleeing, in the sense that I'm running away... I pull up the shutter with enormous effort, it's broken, I want to feel alive again, and I put on Primal Scream... yes, because tonight I'm going to the Dancing in Miradolo, and I'll leave Usher, Morella, and the Black Cat to you, the neighbor can deal with it.