Michael Jackson
Off The Wall

THE REVIEW

Before reviewing the album in question, I want to extend my most sincere apologies to all the people endowed with a minimum of common sense who, rightfully so, shudder with anger and disdain at the sight of a new Michael Jackson review (something that, in reality, should happen to every sane individual). Mea culpa: it was a moment of weakness on my part, I could have easily spared myself, I know it all too well; take it as you want, as an assault on your peace, consider it psychological terrorism, I agree with you.

I too am exhausted by this stupid and unbearable idolatry from the media and fans that have relentlessly tormented us since the character in question passed away (they even made a movie). It's a torment, I know, and I also know very well that just as much as you hate the diehard MJ fan's review, you will also hate my review, and you will hate me, even just for making you read once more in the Debaser homepage "Michael Jackson." Forgive me, I ask you sincerely. This review is simply a vent, an avoidable vent for its own sake, nothing more.

Now, I do not hide from anyone that I have always felt all possible disgust and hatred towards the character in question, considering him the botched abortion of a degenerate and hypocondriacally unnatural society, the emblem of the most mediocre hypocrisy, and detesting him with all my being both humanly (if it were up to me, a nice guillotining...) and musically, which is what concerns us in this case, at least I hope. I would almost dare to say that Michael Jackson represents the anti-musical par excellence. For a start, quite simply, he has a really unbearable voice: it sounds like the lament of a man who has just had his testicles crushed; thin, shrill, and not even too well-tuned. But if only that were the problem! Songs like those sung by our "king of pop" (and what else could a little turd be king of?) are among the stupidest and most pointless things you can possibly hear.

By the way, I have to ask Jackson's fans a question, what do you think of Britney Spears? No, because I have often found the tendency in various blogs and forums of the aforementioned singer's fans to speak ill of Britney Spears, Paris Hilton, and various little floozies who have nothing musical without realizing that their idol in years and years of career has almost always been at that pointless level. I put that "almost" because I have to admit that the album "Thriller" (next to horrors like "The Girl Is Mine", "The Lady In My Life" or "Human Nature") had a few well-packaged tracks ("Beat It", with a guitar solo by Van Halen, "Billie Jean" and the title track), but for the rest the level has always been the same from "Dangerous" to "Invincible," from "HIStory" to "Bad" (even though here I save "Smooth Criminal") or the much-loved "Off The Wall". It is this album I would like to talk about (which on this site has 4 reviews, each of which gives it 5 stars!), the adult debut of Jackson, adored by the public and critics.

It all starts with "Don't Stop 'Til You Get Enough", a silly hit parade song with a tune as catchy as it is reprehensible which, despite everything, had remarkable success (like everything signed by this man). "Rock With You" is even worse; it even manages to be syrupy without being particularly slow, it's an abomination that epitomizes bad taste, the worst you can possibly hear. "Working Day And Night" and "Get On The Floor" are other useless, highly rhythmic tracks like "Don't Stop 'Til You Get Enough" while the title track "Off The Wall", a rather uncertain little song, is ugly beyond measure, especially in the chorus (I feel a real sensation of physical discomfort hearing that horrible shrill little voice shout "Off The Wall"), the same goes for the following "Girlfriend", horrible.

"She's Out Of My Life" is one of those overly virtuous and pathetic ballads that should make us ashamed as men even potentially to write: it is the most syrupy and stupid thing you can conceive, the anti-music par excellence, centuries of music history's work gone up in smoke, an absolute disgrace; it's the worst on the album (Jackson, among other things, is known for having made the most banal, stupid, tedious ballads ever, no joke, listen to even "The Lady In My Life" for example, in my view it condemns itself, exactly like she's out). The remaining 3 abominations ("I Can't Help It", "It's The Falling In Love", "Burn This Disco Out"), continue in the vein already traced by the other tracks, meaning they are just as stupid, bland, insignificantly horrible.

This is "Off The Wall", this is Michael Jackson...