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Rating: Attention, handle with care: this record is hot!
As our friend Freud teaches us, human life is mainly aimed at the act of procreation and at enjoying those five-thirty minutes of pure pleasure that the experience can give. Given the central importance that such an act takes in our lives, man has not hesitated to resort to science and its best minds to rid us of those minor inconveniences that can come between us (especially if you are male) and the longed-for pleasure. It has thus promptly provided us with Viagra, Delay Condoms et simila, which have taken care to free us from some nasty dysfunctions that can concern all of us (except yours truly obviously!). But even once one has ensured full operational capacity, there always remains a big dilemma, that is, finding a partner, which as the most experienced among you will know, plays a crucial role in the whole affair.
Well, in the face of this latter dilemma, even science has so far been powerless, as there still is no pill that makes people compliant towards you, or at least puts them in a condition suitable for mating; unless you consider the so-called date rape drug but surely you don't want to resort to that, do you?! Not so much for ethical reasons (hahaha!) but because you risk getting charged and sentenced to prison, and trust me, you will receive far too much attention there! To circumvent this inconvenience, people have resorted to various means: some pay directly in cash, while others prefer a more indirect approach by flaunting luxury cars, villas, etc. Instead, those too lazy or stupid to make money have invented feelings, attempting to hoodwink some poor unsuspecting person willing to satisfy them at the bare minimum in exchange for a few dinners in second-rate restaurants.
Well, my dear ones, from now on you won't have to resort to these little tricks anymore! Dan the Automator, with the collaboration of Mike Patton and Jennifer Charles, offers you with this splendid CD, for a ridiculous price, an incredible concentrate of perversion, lust, and aphrodisiac energy, as well as a sure means to hook up! The only effort you need to make is to find yourself alone somewhere with the victim, the lucky object of your attentions, and play the record: the intimate atmospheres and the warm duets between the two singers will immediately send the testosterone soaring, and your chosen one, seized by a fit of passion, will have no one but you to unleash their lust on! 100% guaranteed results, satisfaction or your money back! You'll never go home empty-handed again!
So don't waste time and make this CD yours! Call now! The first ten lucky people to reserve the work will also receive a gift of a pair of fun leopard-print handcuffs!
Tracklist Lyrics and Videos
01 Stroker Ace (04:29)
monsieur Dan, can i come with you
as you both look awfully kind
sadly he and me are through
let me tell you what i've got in mind
i'll sing to you my mewing charm
looks like you both could use a pet
and purr my purr all night long
i think a pussy's your best bet
stroke that shiny coat
stroking is the antidote
stroke that, it's a start
only for the wild at heart
stroke that shiny coat
stroking is the antidote
stroke that shiny coat
stroking's what it's all about
my tail alone could tell you tales
it's got a life all of its own
watch it move just like a sail
sail you to the twilight zone
i love to lap a spot of cream
and i assure you that i'm neat
but you never know what you can expect
when the pussy is in heat
stroke that shiny coat
stroking is the antidote
stroke that, it's a start
only for the wild at heart
stroke that shiny coat
stroking is the antidote
stroke that shiny coat
stoking's what it's all about
i like to watch, if you don't mind
every sphinx knows how to pass the time
your little love nest suits me well
let me show you how to cast a spell
stroke that shiny coat
stroking is the antidote
stroke that, it's a start
only for the wild at heart
stroke that shiny coat
stroking is the antidote
stroke that shiny coat
stroking's what it's all about
04 Book of the Month (04:30)
you and me are the disease and the germs are spreading
use me like listerine, keeping your breath fresher
feel the stroke of your paintbrush, my blank sheet of paper
i'm your book of the month, read the fine print later
we'll invent new four letter words
you are the bitter, i am the sweet
run through the fields, sing with the birds
you are the griddle, i am the meat
i'll turn you on like the electric company
you are the bitter, i am the sweet
flick on the switch and light your pilot light
you are the griddle, i am the meat
you and me are the disease and the germs are spreading
use me like listerine, keeping your breath fresher
feel the stroke of your paintbrush, my blank sheet of paper
i'm your book of the month, read the fine print later
we'll laugh away our golden years
you are the bitter, i am the sweet
we'll line the clouds with silver tears
you are the griddle, i am the meat
you and me are the disease and the germs are spreading
use me like listerine, keeping your breath fresher
feel the stroke of your paintbrush, my blank sheet of paper
i'm your book of the month, read the fine print later
you and me are the disease and the germs are spreading
use me like listerine, keeping your breath fresher
feel the stroke of your paintbrush, my blank sheet of paper
i'm your book of the month, read the fine print later
you are the bitter, i am the sweet
you are the griddle, i am the meat
you are the trick, i am the treat
you are the circus, i am the freak
you are the bitter, i am the sweet
you are the griddle, i am the meat
you are the trick, i am the treat
you are the circus, i am the freak
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