Landscape
From the Tea-Rooms of Mars to the Hell Holes of Uranus

Exactly 33 years ago, in February 1981, the second LP by Landscape was released, a British band formed in the mid-70s that would soon join the emerging New Wave scene and be classified as New Romantic.

The title of the album, "From the Tea-Rooms of Mars..to the Hell-Holes of Uranus", which in Italian means "from the tea rooms of Mars to the infernal holes of Uranus", evokes distant and mysterious worlds. The cover, warm in colors yet cold and bleak, is almost incomprehensible and open to subjective interpretations: it could depict a strange teacup slipping into the abyss.

The credits group the tracks (10) into "From the Tea-Rooms..." and "to the Hell-Holes of Uranus", and for this reason, the album can be defined as a concept. While stylistic similarities are obvious, from a conceptual standpoint, the sung tracks tackle the West and its vices as the main subject. "Norman Bates" is the exception in every way, a perfectly fitting outlier. 

The record opens with "European Man", released in 1980 as a preview single. The first 50 seconds send a chill down your spine: the desolate and alienating ambient landscape, composed of hypnotic whirlwinds of synthetic strings overshadowing essential piano notes, is just a fragment but enough to entice listening to a group like Landscape, forgotten over time. After the thundering electronic drum burst in which the intro culminates, trumpet and electric guitar forever change the atmosphere, invigorating it, and now the way the chorus is sung remains etched in the mind.

It continues with "Shake the West Awake", a lively pop song typically from the early 80s that could have been composed by Heaven 17 and, all things considered, isn't bad at all.

After this sonic déjà vu, it's time for "Computer Person", perhaps the most complete and balanced moment, vaguely melancholic and with a title that hints at the future. It is essentially an instrumental despite the few phrases spoken by a robotic voice.

We then arrive at track number 4, the one with the most cryptic title, "Alpine Tragedy/Sisters", another instrumental that starts reflectively and then becomes even triumphant. "New Religion" could be its natural continuation if it weren't for "Face of the 80s" separating them. "New Religion", also instrumental, is the most hopeful track on the entire album, characterized by a homely sound. "Face of the 80s", on the other hand, resembles "Olympic Games" by Miguel Bosè.

So we come to the track that gave Landscape fame: "Einstein a Go-Go", a success probably due to the tune played with the flute that makes it very catchy and original. Its lightness, however, is only formal due to the apocalyptic content: humanity will be punished on the day of judgment, things will be put in order but without any warning. This explains the phone conversation that precedes the track, which is meant to announce the impending catastrophe. What does Einstein have to do with it? He is relevant because this phenomenon can be summarized in the famous formula E=mc2, also mentioned in the lyrics. 

Following is "Norman Bates", the second most well-known track of the band. Deservedly ascended to the status of a classic, as already mentioned, it has nothing to do with the album. If you don't know who Norman Bates is, towards the end of the track, a voiceover unfolds his tragic story, and we discover that he is the protagonist of Psycho. The track, which lasts over 5 minutes, is dark and decadent yet at the same time, mischievous in the vocal delivery.

"The Doll's House", yet another instrumental track, contains some good ideas but leads nowhere except to the initial notes of the title track, the most hybrid track ever, with which Landscape managed to blend and sublimate their two souls, the synthetic and the jazz one. "From the Tea-Rooms of Mars..." is not only long in title but also in duration, almost 8 minutes, and consists of three movements. The first (The Beguine) starts with the sound of an electronic toy and then becomes the quintessence of nostalgia during the synth solo, both "naked" and sung. The second part (Mambo) and the third (Tango) are instrumental, characterized by the ever-present trumpet, now funny, now distorted and weary. Not to forget the male voice that occasionally intervenes, first in the refrain, to enthusiastically introduce the track, and then in the middle and at the end of the performance. 

Certainly "From the Tea-Rooms of Mars..." is not a boring record, and it is undoubtedly a small masterpiece worth rediscovering precisely because it is obscure. Although there are minor pieces, the valid ones (8 out of 10) cannot simply be called songs. For those who have never tired of the 80s and indeed want to continue exploring the New Wave, this record will satisfy you to the point where you'll say to yourself: how did I not discover this before?