Frank Zappa
Joe's Garage Acts I, II & III

THE REVIEW

For the series "The very best of Zappa/The Mothers", here you have: "Joe's Garage"!!!

A huge concept album spread over two discs for a total of about 115 minutes. An album rich in lyrics but backed by great music, always composed by friend Frank. Now I will briefly (very) explain the story told in this work.

Joe was a happy guy who often mowed the neighbors' lawns when one day he discovered rock music. From then on, he spent all his time playing loud music in his garage, and the neighbors often called the police to make him stop. Furthermore, he loses his girlfriend Mary, a Catholic girl who leaves him to follow a band called Toad-O, with whom she hits the road, sleeping with the groupies. Later, she is abandoned in Miami, and she's too tired to do anything: so she participates in a Wet T-shirt contest to scrape together some money and go back home. Joe learns about her "performances" and takes up with a woman named Lucille, who gives him an unpronounceable disease. Thus, Joe turns to the church again for help. Then, I'm not quite sure how, but he is identified as a latent fetishist appliance, and he is trained to go to a studio and gain sexual gratification through the use of machines. When he destroys an expensive machine by peeing on it, he is sent to jail where he is repeatedly sexually exploited. Upon his release, music has become illegal: thus he loses his sanity, and begins to imagine all the guitar notes he cannot play. After a long time, he accepts the illegality of music and goes to work as a muffin freezer.

After such a convoluted story and very attentive listening, one can conclude that this album is one of the biggest challenges overcome by Zappa, and one of his most intricate, original, and musically indisputable works. This great "acoustic representation" is indeed divided into three acts.

The first is the most explanatory regarding Joe's story and his vicissitudes. This act is marked by great Zappa-like riffs and lyrics that are quite comprehensible even for those with an intermediate level of English. I highlight the wonderful "Catholic Girls", "Crew Slut", and of course the title track. Also notable is a small piece called "Why does it hurt when I pee?" (no translation needed!).

Second act: the songs begin to become musically more intense, and the lyrics are more intricate. Worth remembering are "Sy Borg", "Keep it greasey", and "Outside Now".

The final act is predominantly instrumental and consists of 4 unforgettable tracks: "He used to cut the grass" (8:35), "Packard Goose" (11:31), "Watermelon in Easter Hay" (an unexpectedly angelic piece, one of the most beautiful ever composed by Frank) and the finale "A little green rosetta".

The whole album is also "interrupted" by the interventions of the Central Scrutinizer (the voice is Zappa's own), a sort of nosy and pedantic law holder who informs about the events taking place. The voice of Joe, on the other hand, is assigned to Ike Willis.

In conclusion, I apologize for not excessively discussing an album which would require more than a page to cover, but I add that it is an absolute must-have for all Zappa fans, and it may also interest those who are not exactly fond of him. I also want to add a comment: in my opinion "Joe's Garage" is one of the greatest confirmations of his endless talent, and it perfectly demonstrates that he was one of the greatest (if not the greatest) composers of the twentieth century. I would have liked to put the entire textual work, but it would have been read by about 0 people.

Impossible to give a rating offhand, but 5 stars are more than assured.