FKA Twigs
LP1

I'm not sure this is a great album, I'm not even sure I exist, let alone if I'm sure Tahlialahah exists. It's wonderful to hear the specialized people say - "this is the future of music" - and I say - "HAVE YOU EVER HEARD THE TALULAH GOSH????" - Talulah Gosh is an amazing band, nothing like this album made through various collaborations and producers who did a bukkake centered around Tahlialhaha, the same thing those who were mesmerized by this mess could imagine. Have you seen the cover? Tahlillhial has a bruise on her face, you know who did it, the one with the longest member who went overboard during the bukkake and hit her, caught up in the situation. Poor Tahlahahaha, and to think she imagined she was making an album thought out and realized by herself, instead she's become the focal point of this circular game, and in the end, they might have even thought - "But if we get Nicky Minaj to do this stuff? Her big backside will make a splash and we won't have to think about bukkakes but about anal"-. And can you imagine doing anal with Minaj? All that silicone, when you insert the stick it feels like you're jacking off with 2 helium-inflated balloons, not the tense stories, but helium the noble gas, yes the one that lives in a castle, they get married and it will be, love for eternity, but asfhash that life doesn't go quite that way, sometimes it's complicated just like a hurdle race where you can't retire, and then, I don't remember, but surely in the end, there will be FKA winning a platinum record and everyone will shout REVOLUTION, as if she were Groucho Marx.

Then this thing that the music of the future must be composed of glacial, impersonal, alien, and alienated artists, but really, we worked like dogs to make music to estrange ourselves from the bourgeoisie, and now they make us believe that music for the urban proletariat is this stuff that the posh kids listen to with their rolled-up pants with their dentist dad who bought them an apartment in the center of Milan? Then I heard them say "SHE'S THE NEW POP HEROINE" it's probably just a drug, like heroin, the more you listen the more you're hooked.

But tomorrow we'll all be better, it's Christmas, Jesus the Child was born at Christmas, while Jesus the Adult was born at Easter, while Tahlhllhla died, she died when she made LP1, the tedium, the boredom, the jerking off to pass the time listening to this LP was even more tedious, at least I watched Faye Reagan, she's what gets underground music going.