Fergie
London Bridge

THE REVIEW

And how can you forget the summer of 2005? The usual boring summer. Sure, friends, evenings at the cinema, afternoons at the beach, but it's always the same monotony.

Even musically, it's always the same thing. Now and then, some jerk comes up with a chorus inspired by listening to recordings from mental institution archives and, boom! The hit song is born, all the kids go crazy for it, and all the sane people (and, except for a few exceptions, all of us here at DeBaser) call for censorship from CODECON (I don't know if I spelled it right, it's the one that censors TV programs anyway). The Summer 2005 award for being a pain in the ass went to Gwen Stefani, hot as you like, but who drove us all into hysterics with that pathetic rap of " Hollaback Girl ", always on repeat, so if a minute went by and you hadn't started to hear that initial drum, it meant a short circuit had knocked out your electrical appliances.

Year 2006: after an album considered vibrant by the majority and simply extremely banal for me, the Black Eyed Peas decided to let their sexy singer Stacy Ferguson, known as Fergie, go solo for a bit. In just over two weeks, like a mushroom, Fergie's first solo album (titled "The Dutchess", a ridiculously banal reference to the Duchess of York) pops out onto the music scene. The chosen single? "London Bridge". What to say about this song? Three things:

1) MORE LIKE A MUSIC VIDEO IT SEEMS LIKE ONE NIGHT IN PARIS PT 2

2) IT'S PRODUCED BY WILL. I. AM'S RECORD LABEL

3) IT'S IDENTICAL TO HOLLABACK GIRL

There's not a single note of this rap that isn't the same as Gwen Stefani's. And there's not even a pixelated frame in the video that doesn't match Gwen Stefani's. Fergie is accompanied by two Japanese breakdancers (very reminiscent of Stefani's Harajuku Girls), she's dressed like Stefani (extremely low-rise pants and a white crop top), acting the badass throughout the video like good Gwen. In short: wasn't the quarterly crap enough, now a year later they're bringing it back? Shocking.

Fergie, get into volunteering!!!!!!!!!!!!