Dolapdere Big Gang
Local Strangers

Turkishmen in New York.

These are times of Melting Pot, of mixed spirits and contaminations, of integrations and cultures that exchange and bounce off each other. All very nice "on paper" and potentially admirable if not for the fact that sometimes the "beautiful game" shows its limits and even the most "well-disposed" person gets fed up.
Here I am, indeed, making a digression from my usual territories to review one of the worst nonsense I've ever had the misfortune to listen to, after Berlusconi's speech in Brussels and On. Diliberto's rants on Porta A Porta three months ago.
I'm talking about this work of Turkish origin, just released (but I fear scarcely available here) by these improbable "Dolapdere Big Gang", 8 musicians who, armed with traditional instruments in alaturka (of ancient Turkish origin), have attempted to reinterpret Classic Hits of Western culture, much maligned and feared by the more extreme fringes of a certain fundamentalism deeply rooted especially there.
A crafty "pass" for Turkey's entry into the EU (already credited, for that matter)? Likely, although the operation could have been conducted a thousand times better.
So here is listening with a touch of perplexity (more than a touch, let's say an iceberg!) to a bizarre Englishman In New York (by Sting), an embarrassing and unlistenable Smoke On The Water (by Deep Purple), a parodic Losing My Religion (by R.E.M.), the mythical but here abused It's Raining Men (soundtrack of the '80s), a frightening Billie Jean (Michael Jackson) complete with tablas and Arabic rhythms in the background.

After the first minutes in which one truly doesn't understand the "artistic" sense of it all (assuming there is one), it becomes clear that the operation is the result of A BIG FARCE to make the Arab-sound acceptable to Western ears, unfamiliar with these "strange" sounds. BUT the truly unforgivable thing is that the vocals are pathetically Western, sung in an out-of-place American, moreover poor imitations of the original performers. A work neither meat nor fish, in short, that annoys both sides.

It continues with the miserable Something Got Me Started (by Simply Red) or with the hallucinatory trashy-gem of Enjoy The Silence (by Depeche Mode), really obscene as few! Also Shut Up (by Black Eyed Peas) or the revolting version of Feel (by Robbie Williams which fits Arab culture like a smoked cod fits the English Pudding Cake) and of Serenade (by Steve Miller Band).
Is there a thread connecting AT LEAST these songs? And why not Sgt. Pepper by the Beatles or Strangers in the Night by Sinatra?! On what criteria was the lineup selection made?
The least worst thing, all in all, is Madonna's cover La Isla Bonita for the already Latin and vaguely orientalist flavor of the original that doesn’t stray far.
This "Festival of the Horrible for its own sake" ends with the historic Can't Take My Eyes Off You (the 1967 hit by The Four Seasons covered by every Tom, Dick, and Harry that made singer Frankie Valli's fortune) here mutilated and distorted into a shapeless, senseless hybrid, where the "joyous American glamour" is bastardized with tablas, bows, and various Turkish elements, really out of place and forced like two Sumo wrestlers invited to an Armani Party.
A bleak and truly terrible operation: one of the worst things spawned by this "Global At All Costs" mindset that this Western culture is trying to absorb (in the sense of: let’s get used to it!).

I much prefer a "regime of "separation of assets" between cultures rather than these low-grade nonsense that lead nowhere.