What can I say, I don't think there's anyone who remembers the Disney movie called Hercules, am I right? The one with the usual formula of a famous protagonist, the protagonist's charming lover, a charismatic villain, songs that stick in your head forever, a fantastic story, and guaranteed fun?
Well, the film I'm reviewing has NOTHING to do with Disney's masterpiece.
Absolutely nothing.
Exactly, because Hercules the Son of the Gods belongs to Dingo Pictures, a German company founded in 1993 (I don't think there's any need to say it) that is the author of blatant copies (and also grimy and greasy) of Disney animated films (and also some from DreamWorks).
Let's go in order and start with the plot...
In the opening scene, on Mount Olympus, we see the gods Zeus (a spitting image of Heihachi Mishima from Tekken), Europa, Aphrodite, Hera (mother of all gods, made beautiful), Dionysus (old and flabby) and Orpheus (how handsome you are). Zeus decides to introduce a new face, under pressure from his fellow gods (except Hera). Everyone except Hera votes for Zeus, daughter of Alcmene, while Hera decides to have Aristide, son of Diana (herself a daughter of Perseus), born first. Hera ensures that Aristide comes into the world first. 16 years later, Hercules and his friend Iolaus are approached by Zeus, who proposes the TEN challenges to overcome (as in the myth, eh?). The two mortals head to Thebes, and Hercules first defeats the Lion of Nemea—oops, Thebes—then the Hydra, A FIVE-HEADED SERPENT (distracted by a mouse thanks to Iolaus), and finally the centaur Nessus in an epic battle of proportions that Dragon Ball step aside. Thebes already sees Hercules as their hero and accepts the fourth challenge: capturing Cerberus alive and dragging him from the Underworld... aka a puppy, because making him giant and three-headed was too mainstream. But Hercules and Iolaus overhear a rebellion led by Hades, leading griffins, cyclopes, and centaurs! (A hint of plot! I'm almost moved!!!). And obviously, after an epic battle as always, Hercules saves Olympus and Greece, but instead of simply accepting his godly state, he goes to Andromeda and Iolaus, and the three ride off on three centaurs. BEST ENDING EVAH.
I think the only things I can deal with now are the plot and the dubbing: indeed, I would say that the only thing that could save this film is the dubbing (sure, not too good, no recognizable voice actor, but nothing tragic), and that's fine with us. Nice, however, that they appointed ten tasks for Hercules to accomplish, while he only did four. PERFECT.
Well, considering all this, you would all think: WHAT THE HELL DID I WATCH?!? THIS IS THE WORST ANIMATED FILM EVER CREATED IN HISTORY!!!
And I agree with you: it has no noteworthy plot, it's pathetic, it teaches you nothing, ruins your liver, and urges you to stick two fingers in your throat and vomit everything you've eaten in an entire week...
...but that's the charm of trash like Dingo Pictures.
Rating 1, because I want to be generous with this film, which, thank goodness, has a decent dubbing, even by Dingo Pictures standards. However, don't expect this film to be taken seriously, okay?
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