A layer of dust had settled on it when I found it again. It was behind a five-string bass that I haven’t played in ages, and I had finally decided to tune it. I could have borrowed it from the internet, but the original always has a different effect. I didn’t remember the frame enclosing it being so fine. How are you Dear Friend? I hope those cowardly wounds have healed. Here, on Earth, that blood hasn’t clotted yet. Truly.
How is George? I hope in that immense wheat field Dexies pills are allowed, the ones that kept us awake on those German nights. All strictly white. A Harrison-Lennon or Lennon-Harrison tandem? Perhaps the latter has more resonance. You always manage to come first. I hope you’re having fun.
It’s hard to talk to you from here as I look at this shot from so many years ago. If I bring it close to my eyes, I can hear the echo of the screams that drowned out our instruments. Like with seashells lying on the shore.
How carefree we were back then… I was thinking about when you put your hand on my shoulder and were already drunk. We’d skip school to jot down some lyrics and rehearse those chords we could never get right. Then, when we shook our mop-tops to drive the girls wild and when I’d step closer to double your voice live. And the polite bows to win over the press… always rushing, between hotels, TV studios, stadiums, planes… Luckily, it all changed later on… We were indeed tired… that lunatic Ringo said if we went on stage and farted, they’d still scream. And he was right.
Unfortunately, not everything can go well, and I felt bad when you slowly started to take perhaps even some risky steps to distance yourself from us. I was very upset to fight with you. It’s also true we were all angry. We had just split up, but hadn’t seen much of each other for a while. We had become incapable of standing each other and couldn’t have imagined hurting each other. Us.
In my heart, I hoped this wouldn’t happen and yet… Poisoned darts in our songs… if I took a bull by the horns, you’d respond by grabbing a pig by the ears. I didn’t sleep for quite a while, while you were convinced I slept just fine. Come on, it’s over…
However, you knew Yoko never sat well with me. I even hugged her a while ago… your kids were there too. However, it didn’t seem to have any particular effect, in fact, I must confess that even with you she wasn’t exactly kind when you left. For being your wife, she was perhaps overly caustic, but these are things you might resolve with her. I recognize I was a bit of a jerk to you after you left and sometimes I regret it. I assure you, though, I did it more to annoy Yoko. I hope you won’t hold it against me when I come to visit you.
After that day, I understood nothing more. I often talked to myself, convinced I was talking to you. I cried a lot and won’t hide that I would want you Here, Today. Sometimes I get emotional when I think of you, like it’s happening now. Even those wonderful people who still follow me notice it, you know? Especially those in the front rows… very often there are many girls who are about Heather’s age or just a bit older, and those who used to throw gummy candies at us come to mind…
If I focus on this photo, I feel the warmth of your arms and squeeze this frame until my shoulders start to burn. Sometimes, above my head, it seems I can hear you gently grinding your teeth or even swallowing. Your chin makes those white hairs I dye so stupidly vibrate. But who cares, my friend…
But enough now… my eyes hurt. Sooner or later, maybe, from a clear ceiling, I’ll see your hands reaching out to help me up. I imagine George will welcome me with a good cup of tea. It’s strange to say from here, but I can’t wait to hug you. Let’s keep it a secret though. When Ringo is also there, we’ll play together again and I’m sure it will be wonderful. Hoping the spectators don’t start screaming too, maybe tearing feathers from their wings… ha, ha, ha, ha…
In my life… did you know I loved you so much?
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