Darkthrone
Under A Funeral Moon

THE REVIEW

There comes a moment in life when you understand the meaning of existence, the power of a kiss given to a girl (even if her name is Gustavo LoPrende). If it were up to me, I would have crapped myself in unison, but if you don't recognize the power of the God Heavy Metal SEISEISEI and record all episodes of LovLaìn Della StrusciaMazze while insinuating La DonnaDelPotente, you understand more than listening to the similar crap worthy of the oratory of San Crispino professed by Don Ghezzi Il Puttaniere.

There are moments when you realize that being tough means listening to liberating burps of Puledre LungoCrinite Nel Bulbo Ascellare and placing the vanilla-flavored arboreal magic on the chapel just to see what happens, and snorting Tipo 00 flour Coarse Grains and Mulino Bianco snacks mixed with Tobacco and Nose Crusts on the highway, usual place of perdition of Don Ghezzi and the entire Oratory of San Crispino, including Altar Boys and DDIO's ShipBearers.

When you understand the moment of SeXXualXenoAnal Hardening, you can truly say you've found your Path, and it goes without saying that besides Eating Smoke and Drinking Genetically Modified Boar Brush Juice, you start Seriously considering the Reckless Use you could make of Heavy Metal Satanic Copulative records like the Aforementioned. If I Place Inside The Mournful Moon, There Will Be A Reason, as Costanzo used to say in His Spiritual Sessions at CiCCiolina's house, and just after placing the Pornographic Material in the AnalStereoTurgiPuledra, And Let The Party Begin...

For the Holy Patience Of GOD and because Don Ghezzi Always Gives His Ass As long as It's Not Fleas And Ticks From a Dusty Tavern. If You Don't Play The Mournful Moon At The Critical Moment Of The Top, You Only Enjoy Half Of It, It's Not Like Mastrolindo Comes Out Whenever You Please, The Rite Must Especially Be Celebrated During The Holidays. If You Play Nocturno Culto Battling In The Forest With His Equipment While Freezing To Death And His Stick Freezes, You Just Have To Love Him And Also Fenriz, Because He Crushes mares besides having it Heavy, He Soaks it in Valsugana Polenta, Oh He Soaks it...

Dedicated To That Pig MachoMan Named Tonio, My Imaginary Childhood Blackster Friend... I Desire You Like A Mosquito sucking Bulb In The Biùs... TE QUIERO MUCHO, HOMBRE SOLITARIO...