Cannibal Corpse
Vile

THE REVIEW

This night I spent entirely throwing up: I like throwing up because it's very Brutal. When I woke up, there was a basin full of vomit next to the bed, and I thought today would be a quite Brutal day. I was just Brutalizing myself with my head in the toilet when that son of a bitch postman rang the bell as he always does when I'm feeling most Brutal (and indeed, I was throwing up and feeling very Brutal): so I took the toilet brush because I wanted to shove it up his ass and make him realize he shouldn't interrupt me when I'm feeling Brutal. But then I remembered that I was still expecting a CD I had ordered and thought it might be better to castigate him later. And indeed, he handed me "Vile" by Cannibal Corpse; yes, today is really Brutal! Maybe it's because my Morbid Angel t-shirt is covered in vomit or because I'm still holding the toilet brush, but the postman, moved by pity, leaves me a chocolate bar as a charity: but it's milk chocolate (which is not Brutal at all), and I throw it away, although I give up sodomizing the postman. Looking at the cover, I notice there's a rotten and stitched up guy on it: I think it must be a really good record because usually, on the covers of bad ones, there aren't any rotten and stitched up guys. My hand trembles as I place it in the player, but at the moment of pressing play, the blood freezes in my veins: today has already been very Brutal... but what if tomorrow wasn't like this? Then I think it's better to reserve the listening for tomorrow (you never know, I might end up having a power day or maybe even a black one!!!).

because it talks about someone who burns themselves: but it really is Today is today, but compared to yesterday, it's tomorrow. Today I haven't thrown up at all, and my ass didn't even bleed a bit when I went to shit: in short, a day that doesn't look Brutal at all is ahead of me. Luckily, there's "Vile" to lift the fortunes of the day; "Devoured By Vermin" starts, and I feel like doing something Brutal like kicking the fridge. However, my mom catches me and slaps me so hard that even Gorge Fisher stops and says "Ouch!". Mom is always so Brutal. But with "Mummified In Barbed Wire", Cannibal Corpse start having their effect, and indeed I have a mad desire to emulate what my favorite singer growls: so I go to the hardware store on Cso. Francia to buy ten meters of barbed wire. Even the hardware store on Cso. Francia is a bit Brutal and always has many Brutal things like axes and drills. Now I just need to find someone to mummify... but who? The postman, obviously. Only he's already passed by today, so I'll have to wait until tomorrow. While crossing P.zza Rivoli, I see that bus number 36 has run over an old man on a bike: sure, sometimes the world is really Brutal... and sure "Perverse Suffering" goes really well with that old jam! I'm so engrossed in watching that scene that I cross on red, and a car almost runs me over: the driver slams on the brakes and tells me to go fuck myself but I don't respect him because he's just Thrash and if he were Brutal, he would have gone straight and killed me instead of insulting me. At home I listen to "Disfigure", which doesn't seem so BrutalBrutal only who burns others, like mom who always burns the roast (now do you believe my mom is Brutal?). Finally, "Eaten From Inside" comes, and I can't tell if it's about someone who ate their own dog (and now, out of spite, it eats its owner from the inside), or if it's about someone with acid reflux... In any case, it seems like a Brutal song. Then there's "Orgasm Through Torture," which has the most Brutal title of all and talks about someone getting their thing bitten off by another: I'm not that Brutal yet to do that, so I listen to "Monolith." What a disappointment, the text isn't Brutal at all: luckily a call informs me that today dad wasn't at the office and is now in the hospital because he got his thing bitten off by a woman. This news reassures me because it makes "Monolith" more Brutal too and also because it makes me realize my father is really Brutal.

And if genetics isn't water, from such a mother and such a father, there could only be a Brutal child. I don't know if the coming days will be Brutal or not, but I'll have "Vile" by Cannibal Corpse with me to help Brutalize each day. I really like Cannibal Corpse because they always make me want to die people (oh, isn't the verb "die" transitive???); but then I remember that people already die in the world, and I smile contentedly because I live in a truly Brutal world.