Blind Guardian
Somewhere Far Beyond

THE REVIEW

The first time I heard the song "Somewhere Far Beyond", I grabbed the rolling pin and started whacking my brother-in-law on the back.

<<What the hell are you doing!>> he shouts angrily.

<<Come on, let yourself get beaten, this song has given me a primal energy that I need to unleash on someone.>>

<<Unleash it on that tramp of your sister.>>

<<You mean your wife?>>

How wonderful it is to be a metalhead when you experience such childish and crude sensations. You realize that music can sometimes really be therapeutic.

This album alternates relaxed moments with a Celtic echo and a boisterous atmosphere with four half-drunk friends, "The Bard's Song - In The Forest," with real wet-foot kicks in the ass, with the cheek that snaps and vibrates. You know what I mean, right? "Journey Through The Dark" - "Time What is Time," to be clear. True epic metal, full of power and melody that makes you want to go down to the street and start a fight with the first feisty old lady with an umbrella (The true metalheads of this planet) you come across. Headphones in your ears, volume cranked up, and a tinfoil sword ready for impact. 

<<You rascal, what are you doing!>> the old lady fights back.

<<Don't resist, old hag, metal is against you.>>

<<I'm your grandmother, you piece of shit! What do you think you're doing!>>

<<Sorry grandma, I didn't recognize you, I was caught up in the essence of metal.>>

<<To hell with your metal>>.

<<Grandma, you don't understand, this is a great album. There's even a Queen cover?>>

<<Who?>>

<<The ones with Freddie Mercury, the singer with the mustache you like, sings the song Barcelona, with the chubby soprano, what's her name...>>

<<Nosferat Tramballè>> she suggests.

<<Yes, her. The song is "Spread Your Wings." There's a beautiful and moving song that also has an orchestral version "Theatre Of Pain" and there's the song that will knock you dead: "Ashes To Ashes".>>

<<My child, the music has gone to your head!>>.

THE MARCH OF TIME IT HAS BEGUN

THE MARCH OF TIME IT HAS BEEEEGUUUUUUUUN