Bill Hicks
Sane Man

THE REVIEW

Bill Hicks had a lot to say and no fear of saying it.

Bill Hicks hated fundamentalists and fanatics. Whether they were religious, political, or of any other kind, he didn't care, because those who were so closed-minded deserved only to disappear from the face of the Earth.

Bill Hicks smoked at least two packs of cigarettes a day. But he didn't care about cancer: he preferred to die happy rather than become a boring, uptight non-smoker.

Bill Hicks had nothing against drugs, quite the opposite. If someone jumped off a roof thinking they could fly, it's not because they're under the effect of drugs; drugs are just a chemical compound. If someone jumps from the top of a house, it's because they're an idiot.

Bill Hicks was non-partisan. He didn't care about being on the right or the left; he just wanted to be on the side of common sense. And as long as people like Bush or Reagan were governing America, it was always better to be on the opposing side.

Bill Hicks loved reading. And when the rednecks would ask him "Why do you read?" he would always reply, "So I don't become a damn waiter at a Waffle House."

Bill Hicks listened to rock'n roll. The Devil's music. And who cares if that meant ending up in hell, better to roast listening to Jimi Hendrix than to stroke around in the heavens with those sissies from New Kids On The Block.

Bill Hicks hated advertisements. They were mini-pornographic films to lure the suckers. Between the lesbian twins and that queer George Michael, you certainly weren't thinking about how good Diet Coke could be.

Bill Hicks couldn't stand injustices. Why were people like Lennon and Bonham dead while incompetents like Rick Astley still walked this earth?

Bill Hicks desired peace. All it took was for those trillions of dollars spent on nuclear armaments to be used to feed and clothe every human being; and still there would be enough money left to explore space, forever in harmony.

Bill Hicks is dead, but not in vain. When we fight for a just cause, when we assert our rights, when justice finally takes its course, we understand that amidst the curses, insults, and slurs, that madman was giving us a message, leaving us his spiritual legacy. Because Bill Hicks was the sanest of all, and he loved us.

Bill Hicks is a hero. Case fuckin' closed.