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Rating: Where has Belinda Carlisle gone? Let's find out by revealing the thoughts of a very particular (former) admirer of hers...
"Star with an ephemeral course, comet of the musical firmament, too soon you misled to be misled yourself. Who remembers you, after almost two decades have buried your name, your music, your blue eyes? It's sad to think that the monster of oblivion has voraciously swallowed up that glimmer of talent, perhaps exploited to the bone, so much so that it was eroded. Yet you entertained us, Belinda: indeed, maybe you entertained your superiors more than us, unworthy listeners... however, we have to admit it: even your early music, in its simplicity was beautiful and immediate. Light-hearted and unpretentious chants, built on a voice, too strong to be pop, too weak to be rock. Because deep down, you didn't have that much artistic talent, Belinda; when did your graphic signs ever engrave a song? And then, when did you ever impose your charisma fully to the audience? No, no, your eclipse wasn't just bad luck because deep down, I know that looking back, you regret not being like a Virgin..., but after all what do you want, the merry-go-round of life, Mrs. Ciccone has managed to exploit it a little better than you, perhaps immediately realizing that where charisma does not exceed supernatural technique as your almost contemporary Van Halen does, then the world's genuflection has to be earned.
You were not entirely able to do so; but maybe because your brief altar you consumed in a land difficult to endure: think of the consolation of your colleague (or rather, the colleague...) Gianna Nannini: although harder than you in sound, at least she cannot complain about the authorship of her songs... yet, beyond the nostalgic gray-haired (or the masochistic gray-haired stubborn to her last convulsions), who else remembers the author of "bello impossibile" or of "maschi innamorati"?... You could have chosen a more versatile space to stay afloat... Look at Italian TV, for example, where muscle-bound women are blessed by small, hunchbacked, bald men discovering talents of people too ordinary to become someone, or where those too brilliant as the president of the chamber believe they can recover the wreckage of their femininity by throwing themselves into the sad parody of TV varieties... but they realize they are too brilliant even for those, and then discover that the secret of their failure is being too brilliant full stop. You haven't been like them, Belinda: your paradise was really too earthly a place to be true... and, perhaps it will not brighten your heart to know that any rocker has relived the emotions of their childhood and your music thanks to a tape bought for 50 cents in a sad and shabby little shop on the outskirts. But after all, life is like that, Belinda... everything follows its course because everything, absolutely everything starts, and everything, absolutely everything ends... and your end has perhaps been one of the saddest because it happened like a weary sunset, affected and reluctant to go down. Gradually, like fog, you dissolved, and only the most pathetic nostalgics remember your passage... Because let's be honest, Belinda... music is a fashion, and you didn't know how to follow its course... you were unable to build a true identity, and you even let yourself be outrun by that crow dressed as a fairy of Doro Pesh, who only has melodious legs.
And it's a shame you didn't last like her, even though you were doing a simply pop/rock genre, not heavy... but perhaps, deep down, you know what I say Belinda? ... that maybe, just maybe it was better this way... AT LEAST YOU GOT RID OF THIS DAMN HABIT OF SCREWING ALL THE PRODUCERS JUST TO GET A CONTRACT... at least now the only thing you screw is the floor of the house... or rather no... let's say you do it because you're forced by our 5 kids... and all that lard you've accumulated since you no longer sing... BUT PLEASE BELINDA... YOU'VE REALLY PISSED ME OFF, ENOUGH!!!! DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THAT YOU ARE NO LONGER ANYONE? Yes, yes, I know... I got caught up by your mouth in 1997 when you stubbornly tried for the last time to annoy the world with a new album ('A Woman And A Man'... go figure...). And then after the mouth, I enjoyed everything else too... (otherwise, by heck, I wouldn't have produced that crappy album...), but so much that after 9 months you gave me the first fledgling... and so for the other 4. But now enough enough enough... aren't you satisfied with the allowance I give you to live? Do you still want to annoy with a new album?... WELL FUCK YOU THEN!"
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