AZ.U.R.
Rock Like Pigs

Ex-Weapon Joey Gaydos (not the Jr.), legendary blues metal guitarist in the Detroit scene, wakes up one morning, puts on poorly cut jeans at the crotch, wooden clogs, a long-sleeve checkered shirt with the sleeves cut off, and a large straw hat. He takes a sip of beer and goes to sit on the wooden rocking chair. It's the porch of his little house. I believe that there, with a mental circuit, he conceives this album, which is then organized by his band AZ.U.R.. He straightens up Tommy Farless, his vocalist, with the only warning necessary: "Come to record depressed and angry, otherwise I'll depress you myself."

To me, there are two categories of hard rock. The first is the serious, noble, and high-ranking one and yada yada yada. The second is the one that fascinates me more (mind you, I'm not talking about glam, which is completely excluded from this categorization). It’s that dirty hard rock, made with a punk spirit, destructive by vocation and squalid by nature. It’s that hard rock yelled by a spitting, robust voice, which could be the soundtrack to the adventures of a failed Z-series detective, one of those infamous and underpaid in a failed Pulp style by Bukowski. It's a hard rock that doesn't care about seeking the virtuous note, indeed, it scoffs and dismisses classic productions because it was born right in the middle of the U.S.A. full of scrap metal and skyscrapers, obtuse and perhaps a bit conservative. It can’t do punk because it only knows how to play that, almost as if it were an instrument of social identification and defense against outsiders. This is a violent hard rock, conceived in a state of perennial camouflage, a hard rock of a place where nothing ever happens. "Live fast, die young" sings Farless in the opener "Son Of A Rock N' Roll", the dance of the fat guy all soaked in beer daydreaming while everything around remains unchanged. What's totally changed is only his mental state. It degrades.

An anger that continues in the more measured "Love And Temptation". It seems to me that Hulk Hogan is singing it after he's smoked all his money. This is filthy 80's American hard rock like the Empire State Building. There are also low-profile TV series effects, a kind of poor man's Miami Vice. The Led Zeppelin seem to have never existed when listening to "Talkin' Dirty", the Michigan criminal anthem. "I Don't Need No Doctor". And who would ever impose a doctor if you sing it like that. Bastard, I care about the skin. This record even goes "Crack", a song for the whore you force to strip before screwing. Blues crawling on the floor. And there's a lot of dry pee on the floor. "2x9" starts with "C'mon baby". Hell for the baby to dance on this absolutely rock rock n' roll. And also roll. "Joey's Lullaby", the ballad for someone who seems to be mourning his dead son, never appreciated enough in life. It's the human side of the beast, and for that, I like it very much. Logically, the beast doesn’t speak. "Way 2 Cool". Oh my, a lively parade rock brings AZ.U.R. to a level of presentability I didn’t think possible. "Takeout Man" is another boisterous rock n' roll to avoid dancing to. That's why I’d stay on the dance floor to fake the hits on the drums hard. "Take Me As I Am". Damn, they even ask you to take them as they are. Rough enough and southern emigrated to the northern states. It’s the song of those who are there where they don’t want to be, but in the morning they have to go to the factory. "Doin It The Hard Way" is the song that's definitely playing when you're wasted with your head down at the pub counter and two meters away there's that one trying to win you over with a glance, and you... smack the glass in her face. "Coalmine Blues". And what do I even need to say?

If you think you are bastard sons of bitches, losers, potentially psychotic, and feel you have a strong tendency towards mass murder with bare hands, indulge in this rotten hard rock album without a care and without virtue. Rock Like Pigs. Spit!

P.S. - logically the wonder year 1990.