Alice Cooper
Welcome 2 My Nightmare

For the 36th anniversary of the legendary and famous concept album "Welcome To My Nightmare," Alice Cooper thought it appropriate to celebrate by recording a second part, bringing along the original lineup of the Alice Cooper Band, composed of Michael Bruce, Dennis Dunaway, and Neal Smith. However, it's not quite a sequel, more of a modern reinterpretation of the dark, depraved, and necrophilic nightmare of Steven, the imaginary protagonist of the prequel. A reinterpretation that, nonetheless, somewhat deviates from its predecessor, particularly in the song lyrics. Although this was already announced, expectations could only be high, very high, especially from the fans. Not to mention the high number of guests present, to name a few: Rob Zombie, John 5, Kip Winger, Vince Gill, Ke$ha... yes, you read that right. Unfortunately, as with many discs/disappointments released in 2011, this has frankly turned out to be one of my greatest and bitterest disappointments. Maybe it's me being a bit too harsh in my judgments, expecting not masterpieces but works worthy of their name and musical-compositional skills from the great dinosaurs of music. Well, this Welcome 2 My Nightmare is not.

First of all, I didn't warmly welcome the idea of a "sequel" to the homonymous concept after a full 35 years; I could already smell the air of a colossal failure. But wouldn't a cake with candles have sufficed? And then, clear and precise ideas are needed to create a remake-sequel worthy of being compared with the original. Well, I believe that Alice's ideas were quite confused, and as a consequence, the result was rather poor, both as a sequel and as a simple album of "Cooper-style" songs. In fact, the final work is disappointing in terms of the quality of the tracks, not in how they were composed and recorded, but because they are almost all unremarkable and deserve to be remembered, even in the short term.

This is immediately apparent in the second track "Caffeine," although a good hard rock piece reminiscent of the early '70s Scorpions, it doesn't fit the style of the Master of Horror. The album even finds space for a bit of rock n roll with a hint of country in "A Runaway Train," fun and catchy but only after a few listens, then one starts doubting why it's present in this album. I'm not exaggerating when I say that the trombone in "Last Man On Earth" is unbearable, terribly unbearable. I can't tell you more about it because after 30 seconds I skipped to the next track and never listened to it again. I must say that after just 18 minutes of uninterrupted listening, the testicles began to slowly detach themselves. But finally, something interesting surfaces with "The Congregation" and "I'll Bite Your Face Off," both great rock tracks, with the second being absolutely the best piece of the entire album. And then we promptly fall back down with a "Disco Bloodbath Boogie Fever" that leaves much to be desired, starting with a poor imitation of disco music only to end with a significant solo by John 5. There are still two songs worth mentioning: "Something To Remember Me By," a soft but acceptable piece, worthy heir of "Only Women Bleed"; "When Hell Comes Home," with a heavy-psychedelic Sabbathian style, is the darkest and most evil song of the album, which aligns more with the concept. No comment for "What Baby Wants," whose presence I don't understand and especially the trust Alice places in the guest on the track, and I believe you know who I'm talking about. The rest of the songs add nothing but mediocrity to an already quite inconsistent album.

Final consideration: if it had been a "normal" Alice Cooper album, it might (perhaps) have achieved a political passing grade, but unfortunately, what loses many points for the album and value for the songs is the clearly inappropriate title it bears. Very daring decision. However, since it's old Uncle Alice, and deep down, I feel almost like a big fan of his (brrrr), I feel too altruistic and lenient to give it a failing grade, so this time I will turn a blind eye. After all, there's something salvageable in the album, and we also have the chance to hear Alice's historic lineup again. It's a pity that Glen Buxton is missing...

RATING = 52 / 100