SUPERVAI1986

In my opinion, she would perform better at 180° rather than on a disc...

wa deep, you're making me remember when I used to "park" the girls from Naples at Piazza Plebiscito with my friends :DD

@schizo no, the site is nardonardo xD

A girl who is about to get married, busy with wedding preparations, asks her mother to buy her a long, sexy black nightgown for her first night. The mother forgets and, at the last moment, rushes to the little shop down the street, but the only thing she manages to find is a short pink pajama set for a little girl.
The mother buys it anyway and hides it in the suitcase under everything else so her daughter won't see it. On the first wedding night, the groom, a little nervous, says to his wife:
- Now I'm going to the bathroom to get ready, darling. But you have to promise me not to peek!
The wife promises and, extremely excited, looks for the nightgown her mother bought. When she sees the pajama set, she exclaims in disappointment:
- Oh no!! It’s short, small, and pink!
And the husband, from the bathroom:
- You promised me you wouldn't peek!!!

In a dark street, a man and a woman are in a car having a good time. After the first round, the woman asks the man for another. He obliges, but evidently, it's not enough for her. And so they go for a third. She wants more and more... she’s never satisfied, demanding a fourth time. The man, exhausted, replies:
- I need to catch my breath first, can I?
And saying this, he gets out of the car. Nearby, under a streetlight, there's a guy changing a tire on his car. Our friend says to him:
- Listen, I have this insatiable bitch in the car who won’t give me a break; I’ve already had her three times but she wants more. And I can’t take it anymore! Would you take care of her while I change your tire? It’s all dark in the car, and she won’t notice...
The guy can hardly believe it—a wild fling with a stranger. So he jumps into the dark car. A little later, a police patrol passes by and, seeing the commotion, stops to check things out. An officer gets out and approaches the car, shining a flashlight inside, and knocking on the window, asks the man:
- What are you doing?
- I’m having sex with my wife!!!
- Can’t you do that comfortably at home?!?
- I actually didn’t know she was my wife until she turned on the light...

A beautiful woman, truly very beautiful, has a big problem of an intimate nature; despite all her efforts regarding personal hygiene and all the money spent on highly specific cleansers... she has a terrible smell down there! But it’s a really intense smell and, above all, it’s always there! This major issue prevents the woman from having any relationships with men, which is driving her to desperation. One day she decides to talk to her gynecologist:
- Doctor, I have a big problem.
- Go ahead...
- You see, I have a horrible smell down there!
- Excuse me, what?!?
- You heard me right, Doctor, it smells down there. It smells so bad that every man, once it gets to the point, runs away...
The doctor, incredulous, decides to examine the patient and nearly faints when she lies down on the gynecological table for the check-up. An overpowering stench attacks his nostrils.
At the end of the examination, the doctor informs the patient that all the tests come back negative and that her overall health is excellent. He then states that he has no idea what could be causing the smell and, most importantly, how to resolve the problem. However, seeing the woman's desperation, he attempts the impossible:
- You see, ma'am, I really don’t know how to treat this issue of yours. But something is coming to mind, and I’ll tell you, but please try not to be offended and understand that I’m suggesting this option only because I realize the discomfort a woman can feel, especially a beautiful woman like you...
- Tell me, Doctor, I’m willing to do anything!
- Well, I have a friend, a handsome man, not extremely handsome but pleasant...
- And so? I don’t see how this could help me!
- Let me finish! This friend of mine has a congenital olfactory problem. Basically, he can’t smell anything at all! Since clinically I can’t do anything for you, I’ll at least try to help you socially by putting you in touch...
The woman thinks about it for a bit and then, with some hesitation, decides to meet this person. A nice friendship develops between the two, they start hanging out together, and they are attracted to each other. The day comes when she asks him to come over for a drink at her place, and after some courting, they end up in bed. Both are nearly completely naked, caught up in the whirlwind of passion. She is completely uninhibited and reassured that her problem won’t affect her since he can’t smell anything. At some point, he pauses and says:
- Sorry, dear, can I ask you a somewhat intimate question?
- Sure, tell me.
- But… does it, by any chance, smell down there?
The woman turns purple with shame, her libido dropping to absolute zero... and responds testily:
- But wait, weren't you the one who couldn’t smell anything?
- That’s true... but my eyes are watering!!!

Peppe, Pasquale, and Ciro are sitting in front of the bar, drinking something cold and talking about their wives:
- "You know, guys, my wife is so dumb that she went to the supermarket and bought an air conditioning unit! And we don't even have electricity!"
The other two laugh heartily, and the second one says:
- "That's nothing! My wife went to the supermarket and bought a washing machine. But we don't even have running water!"
Everyone laughs uncontrollably, then the third one says:
- "Well, my wife is way more stupid, guys! Yesterday I was looking for some euros in her purse to go play at the videopoker. Can you imagine, I found 6 or 7 condoms... and what good are they if she doesn't even have a dick?!?"

In front of the TV, one evening a man is eating peanuts. He throws them into the air and catches them with his mouth when they fall. Just as he's about to catch another one, his wife calls him, he turns, and the peanut lands in his ear. He tries to pull it out in every way with his fingers, only to push it further in. He calls his wife for help, they try and try, but nothing works. After about an hour, they decide to go to the emergency room, but just as they're about to leave, their daughter arrives with her boyfriend. They inform her of what happened, and the boyfriend offers to help.
- Sit down! - the boy says to the man.
He sticks two fingers up his nose and tells him to blow hard. Miraculously, the peanut pops out. After various thanks, the boy goes home, and the husband and wife head to bed. The woman says:
- What a nice boy! He's also skilled. He'll go far, won't he, dear? What do you think he'll do when he grows up?
The husband replies:
- Judging by the smell of his fingers... our son-in-law!

At the bar, he and she meet after a long time. He:
- Hi, it's been so long since we last saw each other. I’m a real estate agent. It’s a tough time: if I don’t sell more houses, I’m in trouble.
She:
- What a coincidence... if I don’t sell my ass, I’m losing the house!

Several years have passed since Betty lost her husband, and she still hasn't forgotten him: this has led her into a deep depression. To help her through this long critical moment, her daughter introduces her to a distinguished gentleman whom she begins to date. After a few weeks, the two seem to like each other, until the man finally invites her to spend a weekend alone at his mountain house. She agrees, and on the first night he strips completely naked, while she presents herself nude, but wearing a pair of black panties. He looks at her and asks:
- Why the panties?
- My breasts and my body are yours to enjoy, but down there I'm still in mourning!
The man realizes that there's nothing to be done for that night. The next night, the scene is the same: her nude with the black panties and him completely naked, but with an erection and a black condom. She looks at him and asks:
- What's that black condom for?
- I'm here to offer you my condolences!